It was getting dark, but I wasn't ready to leave. My parents were packing up, calling my name, but I ignored them, focusing on the water in front of me. The wind blew my hair around my face, tasting like salt and freedom. My fingers on my right hand were cold from gripping so hard on the railing, but I still stood frozen, gazing at the sea and the moon glowing above it. Looking down at the locket in my left palm, his locket, I let myself smile a little.
Something about the ocean made me fall into this trance of epiphany and enlightenment, making everything fuzzy and disorienting. I was in love with the feeling it gave me, no just what it was. It was pretty to look at, but the warmth and full emotion that swelled in my heart made me fall even harder.
Just like him.
He was beautiful, illuminating, absolutely brilliant. But he made me choke on my own feeling, made me drown in the saltiness and freedom of my own love. For some reason, he drove me to a point of madness, ready to do anything for him. Anything to make that smile flash across his face, anything to make him giggle that little snicker that made my knees buckle.
I needed him like I needed the ocean.
Glancing down at the necklace again, the gold chain casting reflections on the wall of the boat. I swayed a bit, water splashing against the edge of the boat. I felt the water hit my cheeks in its frigid beauty, drinking in the sting of the cold salt. Closing my eyes, I squeezed the locket and tossed into the waves, along with the memory of him. I couldn't afford to cling to him, I couldn't bear the thought of his smile, or his laugh, or the way he would tell me that I was poetic.
Opening my eyes, I thought about the first time we met, and how I slowly, but quickly, fell for him. Fell wouldn't be the right word, tripped and scraped my knees would be more appropriate.
May 17th, 2012
I was sitting on the dock, letting my legs swing over the edge and brush the water lightly. My cuffed jeans were loose around my legs, and my white shirt was flowing along with the sea breeze.
I was content.
The ocean was very serene that day, small waves the only activity in the water. Some minnows swam beneath my toes, swarming in hordes around my ankles. I laughed as the tickled my feet, looking back at my house. The lights were off, meaning my parents were still asleep. I shrugged and faced the sea again, breathing in deeply, the briny scent filling my nose.
The ocean was content.
"You're my only friend," I whispered to the water, my own salty water pooling in my eyes. "See, we're very much alike. I have my own storms inside sometimes. I have little oceans behind my eyes."
The water didn't respond, but it didn't need to. I knew it heard me, not literally, but I liked to think so.
"Are you talking to the water?" I heard a soft voice ask me from behind. I turned around and was met with a beautiful boy in cuffed jeans too. His face was sweet, and I wanted to taste it. He was shirtless, his skin soft and smooth. A locket hung around his neck, falling against his perfectly sculpted collar bones. "I thought I heard you-"
"I was," I told him, smiling shyly. "I know it seems strange, but it means something more to me."
"Really?" He asked, taking a tentative step towards me. "Talking to life forces is a normal thing for you?"
I pulled my feet out of the water and tucked them underneath me. "I'm not really talking to it, but to the idea of it."
"That's... Oddly beautiful."
