How To Begin Again

Chapter 14 - You Fit Me Better Than My Favourite Sweater

Chapter 14 - You Fit Me Better Than My Favourite Sweater

Emily and Evan sat in pure silence swinging back and forth on the swing set that had been there for as long as anyone can remember. The air was crisp and the light bare as the two lovers swung back and forth, back and forth with smiles on their faces. "How are you feeling?" Evan broke the silence with his kind words, words which Emily was longing for.

"I'm feeling great I just worry for Adriana." A week had passed and no one had received any contact from Adriana. Everyone knew it was much better to leave her be, let her live her own life. Her life filled with mystery, terror and strife. 

"I'm sure she's fine, she's a strong girl , she's been through so much." Evan's words were soothing and set Emily at ease.

"I wonder if she's spoken to Jamie since, maybe I should go and see how she's getting on."

"You know her better than I do Emily, if she hasn't spoken to any of you she doesn't want to be contacted."

"I guess so, she's been through so much, I just hope she gets in touch soon"

*

The bleak, broken tyre swing in the garden had always been a suitable refuge for Adriana. A phrase which here means a place where Adriana could collect herself, let her thoughts drift away and her emotions sink into the ground. Her arm slowly stroked the broken rope as if it was a delicate piece of art, but today she couldn't lose her thoughts, her mind was hung up on him. She could still smell the cigarette smoke masked in a sweet scent of peppermint. Why had he not stayed in contact? Why had Matt left her behind? Adriana felt once again like an anchor, she had been thrown overboard and as she sunk to the bottom of the ocean she was lost. His soft grey eyes watched her sink, slowly but surely she was fading away. 'I don't even know him," Adriana told herself 'He just helped me because he felt sorry for me.' She was so caught up in her thoughts that she hadn't noticed someone come towards her. For a second she thought it was him, of course it was impossible, he wasn't coming back for Adriana any time soon. However what waited for her was far better, her mum was stood look with a pitcher of a clear liquid and a smile on her face. The smile gave Adriana hope and for now a little glimpse of hope was all she needed.

*

They had stopped swinging back and forth and now just stood still laughing in one another's arms. Their happiness splashed through the air and was lost amongst the mild breeze that surrounded them. Etched with grace and beauty the sun shone and the scent of fresh flowers glazed the atmosphere. "You mean so much to me Emily." Evan said smiling, his sandy blonde hair blew in the light air and his turquoise eyes captured Emily. 

"You're too kind to me," She replied in awe, lost in his eyes. Forgetting her troubles and letting her thoughts sink into the ground she was led adrift into Evan's eyes.

His hand reached slowly for her hair and as the lovers shared a moment of soft embrace the breeze fell and the air was gentle.

*

Ashley poured her daughter a glass of lemonade and they sat on the grass as the peaceful air fell in evanescence around them - a word which here means faded slowly leaving Adriana and her mum in a moment of pure silence. Ashley wore a denim dress which came to her knees, her black hair was tied up in a messy bun which matched her complexion. Adriana shared her mother's beauty and broke the silence with her words, "You look amazing mum," She could see already see her mother changing. Ashley really was starting to become a part of Adriana's life after being absent in her own anger for all these years.

"I'm so sorry my darling, it's taken me too long to realise what I have. You've looked after me for too long and now I need step up as a mum and give you a good life."

"I've needed you for so long and I promise I will forgive you if you live a normal life. Do it for me, I need you."

"We have to build the republic of heaven where we are my darling -"

"Because for us there is no elsewhere" Adriana finished.

*

Back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. Our minds are constantly wondering over what has been, what is and what could have been. We live our lives wondering what if but no matter what decisions we make we must live with them. Back and forth we may go forever, pondering our past and wishing we could change our decisions but as we all know we can't, yet we still do it anyway. For we must go back to go forth.