TIMES CHANGE!!

PART 20 (B)

Hello guys!! So the previous part was about Darshan's thoughts after the trip and in this part I'll like to write Mouni's thoughts after their trip. So this part is basically a continuation of part 18 but in Mouni's POV..

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MOUNI'S POV...

I limped to my room and grabbed a pair of cloths and headed for a warm shower. I took almost a 1 hour shower, and all I was thinking about was him. I don't know what actually I was thinking and why didn't push. No stop thinking about all that Mouni, its gone, its past!! I explained myself and sighed walking in front of the mirror.

I looked at myself my eyes were red, not cause I was crying, shampoo went in my eyes, why would I cry for him. I maybe would one day. I looked at myself and kept on staring at nothing my eyes were not focused at one thing nor were they moving, I just left thme burly. And suddenly my eyes fell on the tape recoder that was kept on the table kept on the other side if the room.

I walked to it. It had been a long long time I had not used it. I switched the switch of the plug it was plugged in on. I blew air on it to clear the dust of it, it shows how long it had not been used. And my eyes fell on the doll sitting on top of the tape recorder, it used to be my favorite doll till dad's death, after that I have harderly even looked at it. Life used to be soo good, but I was never fair to it, I took everything for granted. I used to behave very badly with all the people, so rude, arrogant. But I have understood lately that's not how one is supposed to behave. I smiled sadly at myself.

I kept the doll aside and switched the radio on. I looked outside my window it was yet raining.

Yeh kesa deewan pan hain..
Kya jaanu main kya jaanu

The tape recorder started to paly, maybe that's the tape I was listening to last when I was ever using it, Its Lata ma'am's voice but I recognize the song.

Mushkil hogya kudh ko kese pehacahu main pehachi

I remembered today when I was in the rain and he was about to..ki..kiss me my mind kept on urging me to push him away but I didn't, I don't know why? A tear passed down my cheek and the lyrics broke my thougts.

Din kat ta hain kate na ratiya
kise kahu main yeh sari batiya
godiya khinlone meri saheliya
ab muje lagti hain sari peheliya

Oh this was Madhuri's song from hum apke hain kon. I used to love this song cause of her acting skills, but now the lyrics seem soo sensible, I can relate to them so easily. Maybe I am going through the same phase...NOO I cant be going through the same phase, she was in love  in this song, I a..I am not!

Yeh konsa mod hain umara ka

Yes can someone please tell what phase am I passing through right now.

la lala la
la lala la la la la la
hmm hmm hmm
hmm hmm hmm

The sweet voice broke my thoughts once again..

Man mitrangi uthne lagi hain yeh kesi han yeh kesi
ab jesi hun
phele nahi thi main esi main esi

Ya I never used to be confused in my life, not even in a math exam, but as they say it life is the biggest exam. I smiled sadly

Kilne lagi hain raho main galiya
aakheen dhude sapno ki galiya

Ya what about my dream? I was dreaming of him going to purpose me, did I really want that?

Gudiya khilone meri saheliya
ab muje lagti hain sair peheliya

I smiled at my doll sadly.

"Mouni!!" I heard my mother calling and I switched the tape recoder and went to where the voice was coming from. "yeh le beta baraf laga de per pe jaldi thik hogaega. I nodded. "beta par tuje chot lagi kese?" she asked a bit concerned "vo maa mai..main bathroom main slip hoge thi." I told her and she smiled sighing.

"tum bacche kya samaj te ho, bade hoge toh jhut bol loge apni maa se" she said making me look away. "Duniya se 9 mahine zayad janti hun tumhe main!, nahi bata toh mat bato par jhut kabhi na bolna!" She said keeping her hand on my head. "Mama main jhut nahi bol r hi hun!" I told her a bit annoyed and she nodded. 

I sat in the sitting room with the ice. Even I didn't know why I lied to her. I could have just told her the truth, maybe cause its a lot to explain and I didn't want to do that...

I feel back and unknow to me I fell asleep...