Pride {l.s.}

6- Can't Sleep

"Louis, are you even sleeping anymore?"

I look up from my cup of coffee to see Zayn looking at me with confusion etched into his face. I assume by now he can see the bags forming under my eyes. It's hard not to hear the yawns that echo throughout the empty gallery.

"Just been a rough week," I reply as I sip my coffee.

"Are you going to explain to me what happened that night when you went out for groceries, and I finally left because it was getting so late?" Zayn asks forcefully. "You haven't been the same since. I don't want lies. We're best friends, Lou. Stop shutting me out."

"I ran into Harry, the guy I painted the other day. That was it."

Zayn rolls his eyes and hops off of the stool he's sitting on. He gestures for me to follow him, so I do. He walks towards the studio and opens the door for me. My jaw drops at what I see. It's the picture of Harry and I, but it is more abstract as it sits on the easel. The insults that were being thrown at us have been painted over the grey colored crowd. The only thing in color is the two boys and the words at the bottom that read "Love is Love".

Painting by Wattpad: SilentSaunter  and Instagram: @ Jagmacart

"H-how did you know?" I ask him as I turn back to face him. I can feel the blush come onto my cheek from embarrassment. I should've just told him the truth. "I want you to trust me, but I didn't know what to say about that night."

"The picture is trending all over the internet. You won't believe how many people are calling you goals right now," Zayn admits with a laugh. "How did he even convince you to kiss him? You always say how you're straight."

I shrug my shoulders. "I don't even know honestly. He said how he hated these people for not letting him be himself. He put the tattoo on my cheek and then asked me. I said yes. It's hard not to say yes to him. I did it all for him."

There's was something about the way he looks at me that makes me feel like I can do the impossible, and what I did with him seemed impossible to me.

"Is he the reason you can't sleep?" Zayn asks out of the blue. I can feel his brown eyes looking at me, but I look away. I'm ashamed to be so affected by something so little. I shouldn't be affected by Harry at all, but there I was that night. I was completely affected by him and his every move. If I close my eyes, I can still feel his hand in mine as I watch a flag glide softly behind him as we walk together.

"Maybe. I brought him back here since he helped carry my groceries. He started asking questions about my living arrangements, and I-"

"Pushed him away," Zayn finishes as he lets out a sigh. "That's always what happens, Lou. You don't let anyone in. He could break those walls you have."

"I like my walls," I reply. I get a glare from Zayn before he continues talking.

"As I was saying, you shouldn't have pushed him away, but that's nothing we can fix now. Now you just have to find him and get him back. Even having him as a friend could help."

I shrug my shoulders. "I don't know."

"And as for living arrangements," Zayn continues,"I've told you many times that you can live with me. I don't like leaving you here alone at night in such a small space. I don't know how you don't drive yourself insane."

"I just need to work on getting a second job maybe," I explain. "I just can't afford anything else right now. The rent for this place is high enough."

"I can help you pay. I have leftover money from my family-"

"You know that I can't take favors, Zayn."

My voice comes out a lot harsher than I meant it to. People just push me, and I snap sometimes. Zayn knows that I have difficulties accepting favors, yet he still tries to help me with things time and time again.

"I'm trying, Louis! You don't make it easy to be friends with you, you know!" Zayn snaps back. "You don't open up, and then you push me away! What do you expect me to do?"

I feel my face burning hot in anger. "If I make it that hard for you, then stop trying! We can strictly be business partners then!"

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

***

Zayn has been there for me since college. He used to stay up with me late studying since he knew I had troubles absorbing information sometimes. He would bring my coffee or tea when he knew I was having a rough day. He doesn't know anything about my life before then, but he didn't have to. He never pushed me into opening up. Every once in awhile he would snap at me in desperation to try to get me to admitting to some sad, tragic story from my past.

Zayn won't even look at me now. He hung up the painting of Harry and I in the display room. A couple of people have tried to look into buying it, but Zayn always tells them that it's not for sale. He tells them that someone requested it, and it's waiting for pick up.

It's worse enough having Zayn hating me. It doesn't help to have that moment hanging on the wall staring at me every day. It's beautiful, but it just reminds me about how I let my guard down too much that day. I want to talk to Zayn about how it felt and explain my feelings, but I can't. Especially not now. Zayn and I are both stubborn. It's going to take awhile before either of us admit to our faults.

I've waited days in silence to wait and see who wanted the painting done of Harry and I. I have an inkling on who it may be, and I tend to be that person who always jumps to conclusions. It has to be Harry, right? Who else would want it or know about Zayn and mine's studio?

The answer finally came one day. It was a sunny afternoon when he walked in. He wears a patterned t-shirt with buttons down the middle. He maybe only buttoned the bottom three. I can see the tattoos of the swallows and the tip of the butterfly. His hair bounces as he walks. My breath hitches as his green eyes meet mine.

"Hello, Lou."

Even after the bad blood between us, he's stilling calling me by that nickname. Zayn looks at me and raises his eyebrows. He knows that the only other person allowed to call me that is him. I usually yell at people when they call me that, but I like it when Harry says it.

"Harold."

Harry can't help but smile at the way I address him.

"I'm here to pick up my painting," Harry says, and I nod my head. He follows me over to the painting of us hanging on the wall. Once again, it is hung up at a high level. I try to reach up and grab it, but I stop when I feel a stomach pressed against my back. Harry easily leans over me and grabs the painting. When the painting comes down, it is now in front of me with Harry's arm wrapped around me. I can hear my heart beat faster as I feel Harry's breath on my neck.

"I understand that I pushed you too far that night, but I was wondering if I could still make you dinner," Harry says quietly into my ear.

"Just as friends?" I ask. I try to keep my voice from shaking due to our close proximity.

"Just friends."

After Harry pays for the painting and leaves after giving me his number, I see Zayn in the corner of my eye with a small smile on his lips.

A/N

ONE HUNDRED READS WOOHOO! Anyone else shook with photos of model Harry? They were absolutely beautiful.

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Bye.

xoxo raindropkiss1