A Different Reality (Lasting Love)

Useless Fights

"God, Justin!  You're such an asshole!" I walk out of our room, already pissed off this early in the morning "Can't you see that I'm tired?  That I don't feel good?!"

"I never said I didn't believe you, Jen!"  He follows me down the hallway "I know you're tired, but this is one thing I want to go to!  It's not like we need to stay long."

Kayleigh's door opens just as I'm about to respond to him.  She runs right over to me, obviously scared of the yelling, and clings onto my leg.

"It's okay, honey." I lean down to comfort her "Let's go back to bed." I look up at Justin, letting him know that this is definitely not over, and carry her back into her room.

"Mommy?" She calls out as I'm about to leave her room.  I turn back around and go back to lay with her. 

"Me and daddy were just talking loud, that's all.  It'll be okay."  I rub her back trying to comfort her "You need to go back to sleep so that you're rested for grandma and grandpa later."

"Okay." She replies sleepily and clutches her bunny close to her.  A few seconds later, she's fast asleep.

I walk downstairs to see that Justin is in the kitchen making breakfast.  He doesn't acknowledge me when I walk in, so I make my coffee and eggs, the only thing that doesn't make me want to vomit, and sit at the table to eat in silence.

"I hope you know that I was planning on still going."  I speak up "It's not like I don't want to go to these things for you."

"Then why do you act like you don't want to?" He asks "I go to everything for you.  I've supported you through everything, but I feel like I'm dragging you along every time I have something to be at."

"I'm just tired, Justin.  I'm tired because of so many things, but your events aren't the reason.  They just don't help."  I try to think of how to make this clear to him.  It's really not like I want to skip these, but most days I feel like a walking zombie.  I have a job, a crazy energetic 1 year old, and am also 7 months pregnant.  On top of all that, I'm awake half the night between Kay, the baby kicking my bladder, and just being uncomfortable.

"I don't want you to feel like you have to go, though." He admits "It's no big deal.  I'd rather stay home with you guys."

Just as he says that, the lights blink and the power shuts off.  The loud noise must wake Kay, because she wakes up again, this time screaming.

"What the hell?" Justin looks out the windows "It looks like everyone's went out."

"Well it better not stay off long.  It's freaking hot out."

Justin goes upstairs to get Kay.  I call the electric company to make sure that they know about this, but am informed the transformer blew, and we will probably be without power for hours.

"Look, here's mommy." Justin hands Kay, who is reasonably upset, to me.

"It dark." She complains between cries.  It is unusually dark for this time in the morning.  All we can really see are the flashing lights outside.

"It's gonna be okay, honey."  I carry her into the kitchen and set her on the counter "Do you want some cereal?" Luckily she says yes.  It's not like I can make her anything else anyway.

Justin walks back in a few minutes later with a bunch of candles.  He starts lighting them in random places around the house where it might get dark.

"Kayleigh, look here."  He gets her attention as she eats and points towards the candle on the table "You don't touch these, okay?  We don't want you to get hurt."

"Okay, daddy." She says before going back to eating. 

"It's so freaking hot in here." I complain "We need a fan or something."

"All of our fans are electric. We don't have any that use batteries."  He opens the freezer door for a few seconds to help cool down the room "I don't know what to tell you.  Maybe your parents have power."

I call them and they don't have any power either.  We call other family members and friends but they don't either, and we eventually find out that almost all of LA doesn't. 

"You're going to have to go out and buy one."  I finally tell him.  I'm sitting on the floor playing with Kay, but I feel like I'm going to die from the heat. 

"Are you sure?"  He asks "The power might come back on soon."

"Justin, it's 98° out and I'm pregnant.  I need some kind of fan!"  I practically beg him "It's not really safe for me to be like this either."

"Okay, I'll go buy it."  He starts to walk outside, but comes back in a few minutes later slamming his keys on the counter "Our driveway is blocked.  The whole road is closed too."

"Shit."  I try to think of what I can do.  It's not like we can open windows or anything. 

"Go take a bath or something."  He suggests "The water will cool you off."

"What about you two?" I ask worrying about them "It's getting too hot in here."

"We'll be fine."  He says reassuringly "I'll take her in the pool or something if I need to."

I take his advice and go up for a bath.  Of course, the hot water comes out first, and makes me even warmer than I already was.  While I'm waiting for it to get a little cooler, I look out our window to see them running around.  Justin has the hose out, and is spraying Kay with it as she runs through the grass trying not to trip over all her toys.  He eventually stops, and they play together in the middle of the yard. 

Once the water is cooler, I get in the bathtub and start to relax.  Seconds later, the power turns back on.