A Different Reality (Lasting Love)

Getting Too Big

"Kayleigh can you walk to mommy?" I sit across from the couch where she is currently standing with Justin. They're playing with her little stuffed animals while she leans on the couch trying her best to stand up by herself.

She turns towards me at the first sound of my voice and immediately falls forward, landing face first on the carpet next to Justin.  He picks her up, getting her to stand again, and she looks over at me with the biggest smile ever on her face.  I put my arms out, welcoming her as she tries to walk.  Her wobbly legs cause Justin to follow closely behind her, preventing her from getting hurt, and I watch closely.

She slowly moves her little legs, continuing to inch foreword towards me.  She starts to get braver, taking bigger steps, and finally reaches my hands.  I quickly pick her up, hugging her tightly.

"Good job, baby!!" I praise her, excited about this huge milestone. Justin comes over to us, taking her out of my arms and throwing her around in the air.  She squeals and laughs, letting us know that she loves her daddy's attention.

"She's getting so big." I try to fight back tears as I sit on Justin's lap watching her play "I miss my baby."

He wraps his arms around me, kissing my forehead "She's always going to be your baby.  She'll just be a big baby soon. We could always just have another."

"We will." I smile thinking about it. She'll be such a good big sister whenever the day comes.  Not like it's going to be happening anytime soon.

"Why is it so entertaining watching the baby drop a bunch of toys?  I mean, we know as soon as we hand it back to her or she picks it back up she's going to drop it again.  Why is it not boring as hell?"

"Because she's the one doing it.  The human we made is doing all these things." I watch her closely as she chews on one animal while picking up and dropping another repeatedly "It's such dumb things, but it's so funny to watch her."

Soon after, Kay gets tired of playing with everything and half walks over to us. She makes it a few steps before giving up and crawling over.  I set her on my lap once she gets over, and she immediately cuddles up to me tugging on my shirt.

"I think she's gonna fall asleep soon." Justin looks down at her, watching as she tries her hardest to keep her eyes open while eating "She's been taking her nap right around now."

I look down just in time to see her eyes close for good.  I feel her stop eating, and hand her to Justin to take upstairs for her nap.  He gently takes her from me, not wanting to wake her, and slowly walks up the stairs. Watching them, I admire their love for each other. I have never seen him look at anyone, not even myself, the way he does her. It doesn't even bother me because I want nothing more than for them to have the amazing bond that they are forming.

"She's out." He walks back downstairs "I think she might actually sleep this time."

"So she's not gonna be crying 20 minutes from now?" I laugh, thinking back to the last "nap" she took earlier today.  We barley even made it downstairs before she was crying again.

"I can't believe she's going to be 1 in less than a month." Justin says, adding on to our previous conversation "It still feels like yesterday that we brought her home and questioned everything about life."

"That's because just yesterday we were questioning life.  It's just that we were questioning why we wanted kids when she was wide awake at 4 am."

"Yeah that's true." He walks into the kitchen grabbing us some drinks and snacks "At least we get to finish our movie while she naps.  It's better than when we're too tired to pay attention after she goes to bed."

I laugh as I cuddle up to him on the couch. A year ago, watching a movie in the middle of the day would seem incredibly stupid to us unless we had nothing else to do. Today, it's like a little escape from everything around here waiting for us.  It even gets us out of cleaning up her toys for a little.

"I feel like I should be cleaning up all of her shit she's been throwing around."

"You are such a mom." Justin mocks me "Everything you used to say you didn't wanna turn into you did."

"Well what am I supposed to do?  Leave it lay around here until she's old enough to pick everything up herself?"  He knows that isn't going to be happening anytime soon.  She can hardly even hold a toy and stand at the same time.

"I think she should just not get any new toys until she can help clean them up."  He suggests "I mean she has completely taken over every inch of this house.  She has more than enough for now."

"Hey did you hear that?"  I ask him after a few minutes of cleaning "I swear I just heard a thud from her room."

"Are you sure?  I didn't hear anything.   She was still sleeping when I checked on her."

"Yeah, I'm sure."  I say as I hear it again.  This time, I know he hears it too.  He walks towards the steps to listen closer, before looking back at me "I don't know what it is, but she's really laughing."

We walk up the steps together, and into Kayleigh's room not sure what to expect.

"Aw!  She's playing with her little animals."  I watch as she leans against the inside of her crib, taking one animal at a time and throwing it towards the door.

Justin starts to walk over to pick her up, but is quickly stopped.  She must not want out, because she gets one of he animals and throws it right at him.

"That kids the devil!"  He turns back to me, revealing that she not only hit him with the stuffed animal, but she hit him right in the sensitive spot "She's mean!"

I try my hardest not to laugh while I walk past him to Kay, "Good job, baby!"