Holding On||Peter Hayes (Divergent)

Chapter 37

OKAY GUYS so I decided to change the story title because 'Adrenaline Junkies' wasn't working for me. I'm changing it to 'Holding On'. It seems more suitable and I hope you all are still enjoying the story!

After the talk Peter and I had I went inside, him following after me. "You going to sleep?" He asks.

"No," I say as I begin climbing the stairs. "I'll see you later."

"Yeah..." he nods. He gives me a small smile, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "I'll see you later." Peter turns into the living room to go and bunk on the sofa. I stand still upon the staircase, thoughts rushing through my head. Everything Peter told me loops around. I don't know why I acted the way I had. A part deep inside me knew it was coming - the fact he still loves me. I realise how selfish I'm being. My head spins and I lean against the cream wall beside me. I need sleep, but I can't get any.

My eyes fix upon the doorway to the living room where Peter currently is. Maybe I should say something, not for me, but for him. Just to settle something. But what do I say? Hey ex-boyfriend with undying love for me, I feel bad so I've come to say sorry that you still like me and I'll only tell you my true feelings when I'm feeling better! Really, there is nothing to say - until I figure out what it is that's so important I must tell him. Shaking my head, I walk upstairs to try and regain the ability to sleep.

***

"Stop moping around, Piper," Lynn rolls her eyes. "You've been like this since I woke up. Did you even get any sleep last night?" The girl nudges my calf with her foot. I look down at her from my position on the sofa and frown.

"No. I did not." I reply in monotone.

"Peter brought you in last night, right?" Uriah asks as he shovels oatmeal into his mouth.

"Yeah. He did." The words come out in the same tone.

"And everything was alright?" He looks up at me with curious eyes. Lynn looks over the room at Peter. He's sitting with AJ, surprisingly, and the two indulge in a humerus conversation.

"Yup." I scoop out the last bits of the scrambled eggs in my tin and eat them quickly. I have to admit, this stuff is good.

"You sure?" Lynn presses on.

"What is this?" I retort. "Question time? Am I not allowed to be left alone?"

"We just wanna know if you're okay," Uriah says softly. "AJ told us -"

"I'm fine!" I exclaim.

"You don't look it," Lynn says. I scoff and stand up, slamming my can upon the coffee table. I storm all the way to the bathroom, staring at myself in the mirror. The bruise on my face is healing but still a sick purple blotch; my eyes are glassy and lifeless; the bags under my eyes are dark and extremely heavy; everything about me looks disgusting. I turn away, my hands running through my hair and sink to my knees. I want to break down, scream, tear my hair out. But I can't. There's nothing left inside. It's so empty, so dull, it's like I'm dead.

I hear the door close and footsteps walking towards me. The person in front sits down, setting a hand on my knee. "It's okay to cry," Uriah says. I look up and see him smile at me - though it isn't his smile. It's twisted with grief.