Innocent Lester | p.l.

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Rested head on my shoulder, hands intertwined, and heart beating fast.

Is she really paying attention to the movie on my laptop, I can't tell. Her face is lit from the electronic and I can't stop glancing at her. I'm not paying attention to the movie and I bought this for her.

God, I'm insane. I'm absolutely nuts- I'm crazy.

But I'm crazy for her.

I hesitate to do so but rub her hand with my thumb. She rubs back with her thumb in response and I continue the favor.

Dan's out and we're here alone. I'm appreciating the time for the two of us but I'm terrified of what might happen.
Honestly, I don't care for this film, I just want to be with her. Talk, laugh, even stay silent and stare.

"Are you tired," I whisper in her ear. She's partly laying on me as we collide on my bed and I can feel her breathing.

"No," she whispers back to me, eyes still glued to the screen of Tom Hanks. I stay still, trying not to move and interrupt her concentration no more. Though, I fail with more questions.

"Do you need anything?"

"No. Thanks."

I'm starting to become impatient now and only three words are floating through my head.

I like you.
I like you, I like you, I like you.

Just say it.

"Hey." I hesitate. I'm starting to sweat, and I'd adjust my seating to be more comfortable but I don't want to make her uncomfortable.

"Hm?"

For some reason my words aren't working. Like a broken radio, I'm pressing the right buttons for it to work but it's just quiet. Maybe even staticky. Although, when a radio is staticky it has a bigger chance of coming back to life rather than staying silent forever.

I'm quiet for too long now and she turned her attention to me, eyes away from the screen and head turned. I lift my free hand barely enough for it to still touch the duvet under us. My eyes are on her curious ones and I get lost in them. I'm now not in control and unaware. My hand lifts more and is able to reach her cheek. She becomes red and I do the same.

Kiss her. Do it. Kiss her.

With my palm cupping her face, I pull her closer to me and I lean forward, meeting her half way.

I can't tell if she's moving herself or if I'm pulling her. And for once, I'm bold enough to make the first move and we meet and touch, moving in sync. I'm sweating but soon over come my fear of being pushed away because the absolute opposite is what's happening.

My laptop is being pushed away now by my knee and I'm suddenly uncaring for it. If it falls and breaks, it wouldn't matter. This is what I wanted. This. Her lips pressed against mine as we hold each other by our cheeks and waist and she soon left the stage of blushing and I smiled through the kiss. She did the same and we pulled away, looking each other in the eye.

This time she pulled me in for more and I smiled between them.

The sound of the entrance clicking open made us both jump, turning our attention to the boy I share this room with. Her and I released a breath after Dan had greeted us with a wide smile.

"It's two o'clock," he announces as he places his phone on the counter beside the restroom. The bed I sit upon lifts lighter and she's suddenly standing. Dan turns the lights on and I notice her lips a bit swollen as she smiles at me.

"I'll walk you out." I stand and follow her out the door. She greets Daniel back a goodbye and we both step out of the dorm. Standing in the hallway, we stare at each other and I don't want her to leave.

"We didn't get to finish our movie," I say. She shrugs.

"Maybe next time."

I take her hand into mine and intertwine our fingers. Her hand is small compared to mine and I appreciate the warmth we transfer. I pull her in for another kiss, feeling confident in myself and she lets go of my hand for a transition to my cheek. We release and she lets go soon after and walks away.

I step backward, still watching her walk away, and quickly go back to my room. I open the door and see my roommate standing impatiently before me. He smirks, crossing his arms.

I roll my eyes, "we didn't do anything."

"You're blushing."

"It was a kiss."

"Your lips are swollen."

"It's not like we made out!"

"But it was good, right?"

I shrug, feeling a smile crawl up my face. I rub my eyes and shove Dan out of my way. "It's none of your business."

But the answer to his question wasn't any yes. It was more than that.

And now I know; I was no broken radio. I was working fine. The knob listed as "confidence" just needed to be pushed a little harder.