The Arrangement

The Arrangement_35

{Dixon}




"Nothing has to change." I said as I walked into what was once Lila's bedroom, "if you want we can pick up where we left off." I suggested with a slight hint of lingering hope.

"Dixon." She sighed and leaned against the table. "Half the problem is that we just jumped into everything the first time around, we didn't exactly have a bunch of time to get to know each others flaws or bad habits because we were both trying to impress the other one so we would eventually get married."

"So what then?" I asked as I looked up at her from the hard twin sized bed I now sat on.

"Well how about we become friends."

My entire ego had just deflated.

Friends?

Was A girl really putting me, Dixon Loveless into the dreaded friendzone? I swallows hard and stayed staring at her in pure silence.

"Or maybe the whole roommates thing is better." She added "you know i'll have a room, you'll have a room and we can both go on with our lives."

"You just don't get it, do you?" I said with my head down now. It hurt to hear her say these thing and now I was going to let her know. "Lila, I love you, and you are my life."

She didn't say anything, a couple minutes passed in uncomfortable silence before her mother called up that dinner was almost finished.

"We should go, before they get the wrong idea." She sounded.

"What, a husband and wife can't be alone together?"

"Your not my husband Dixon." She retorted flatly.

I shook my head and brushed passed her, "why do you insist on hurting me Lila?"





{Lila}



"Why do you insist on hurt me Lila?" Dixon mumbled, only his words were full of pain.

Was I really hurting him?

To be honest I was just trying to make sure we didn't rush into anything again. I want to make sure we are together because we love one another and want to be with each other. And even though I love him and love being around him, I still wasn't sure that I wanted to be with him.

Dinner was sufficiently awkward as everybody tiptoed around the elephant in the room that was my marriage.

After dinner I helped my mother with the dishes and then offered to make some coffee. But I knew I was only delaying the inevitable, and sooner or later I would have to go home with Dixon and face the huge reminder that I screwed up our marriage.

I hugged my parents goodbye and promised I would have lunch with my mom sometime during the week and then Dixon walked me to my car.

"Do you still have your house key?" He asked as he held my door open for me.

"Yes, why?" I asked.

"You'll have to let yourself in, take the master bedroom. I won't be home till late, I'll get my stuff in the morning."

"But why aren't you going to the house?" I asked a little upset that he wouldn't tell me where he was going.

"I have prior engagements Lila." He sighed, clearly not wanting to talk about the matter at hand.

I knew I had no right to question him further so I remained silent and got into my car, he closed my door and watched as I drove away.

I seriously wonder where he could possibly be going.

When I got to the house I couldn't help but smile as I walked in. It felt like home, and I had missed this feeling.

Dixon had left everything exactly the same so I walked around the living room and happily looked at the photos that had managed to display our time together. And as much as i tried to deny it, we were happy, once upon a time. Our relationship was unconventional for sure, and nowhere near perfect, but we were happy.

It took me two trips to get all my luggage upstairs, but once I opened the bedroom door to the master suit I was nearly slapped in the face with the emotions that were now swirling in my stomach.

I walked in with my rolling suitcase and stopped right in the center of the room.

Of course Dixon had let the room get messy.

Shoes, pants, tops and ties were thrown here and there. His cologne bottle sat on the nightstand with its cap off next to a half empty glass of water and random coins from his change through out the day. The small waste basket was empty but rolled up wads of tissue laid near it as if Dixon had tried to throw them into the little trash can. The bed wasn't made, but to his credit their were actually clean sheets and pillow cases.

"I don't even want to see the bathroom." I sighed as I left my luggage alone and went ahead and cleaned up the room.

After a few minute I was picking up the last article of clothes, with my arms full I walked into the restroom to put them into the hamper.

I shook my head, the dirty clothes hamper was full, I shook my head once more and took it straight to the laundry room.

I began sorting through his clothes and putting them into the washer, I doubted he even had anything clean to wear for work anymore.

I went back to the restroom and found that it wasn't as horrible as I had thought. He had left his toothbrush sitting on the sink and the cap was off of the toothpaste as well as his deodorant, and he had forgotten to put a fresh roll of toilet paper on the holder and instead had it sitting on the top of the toilet.

I began to put my things away as well as finish up Dixon's laundry.

Once all of his clothes was dry and folded or on a hanger I decided to take a shower.

Fresh out of the hot shower I put on some comfy mismatch pajamas and decided to call it a night. I plugged my phone into the charger and then got in to bed.

But once my face hit the pillow those butterflies in my stomach began to flutter so fiercely. I closed my eyes and smiled as I hugged the pillow to me and inhaled the fabric deeply.

It was Dixon, him mixed with his shampoo and cologne, then I opened my eyes and began wondering where he could be.