Chapter Forty

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Titus had never considered Anna to be a risk taker or a sort of scientist. She had never really experimented with anything that pertained to her life, besides a few projects back in school; but here she was, using him as the controlled variable and herself as the manipulated. He stayed the exact same, and Anna changed whatever action she went through with next.

First, it had been that night so many weeks ago during their Christmas bonfire when she had all but forced him to lay down. On that very same day, she had massaged him, her own breath becoming much heavier than he knew for a fact she had been expecting.

During the weeks after that, he had been able to tell that she hadn't known what to think. A part of her must have been fighting it, but a part had also been slowly accepting it, as well. Which was understandable in the case that she didn't know how to transition from long time friendship with her fake husband to the more intimate stage that Titus knew she was constantly thinking about.

But she must have broken through, for there had been that night right before Tobias's and Jane's wedding when she had asked him to come to bed. There had even been a couch in the room where one of them most definitely would've slept on if it had been a few months before, but Anna had performed another one of her subconscious experiments.

And then there had been that day only a week ago at Napolm Elementary when he had brought her her lunch, had stayed for awhile, and had been about to leave when she pulled him back into a strong embrace. He still didn't know how long they had both held each other, instead of him just holding her. It still boggled his mind every time he thought about his attempted second departure, the one in which Anna had just barely brushed her lips against the corner of his mouth.

She had done it on purpose, he had been able to tell by the look in her eyes and the flushed hue to her cheeks. He still could tell that everything she was doing now, these small, tiny, tiny steps she was taking, were all on purpose because Anna did love him as more than a friend, but she just didn't have enough confidence to trust in herself.

She had never really been one to believe in herself, even more so now that she was pregnant. But here she was anyway, fiddling with her hands nervously as she blocked his view from the television screen. Her eyes made contact with his and then looked away again, her clothed body that had come home from school not even an hour ago fidgeting and doing the gestures that told him she was nervous.

From the way her tongue dabbed against her upper lip a few times, how her toes moved against the hardwood floor in a wave pattern, and the way in which the petite muscles in her jaw moving back and forth beneath the skin, he could tell Anna was frightened of what he would say in response to her question.

She had no reason to be. The answer would always be yes.

“You feelin' okay?” he asked, making his voice sound serious even though he knew this was just another one of what he liked to call 'experiments'.

“Can you...uhm...hold me?” she blurt out and then finally looked at him with everything he had ever wanted to see in those blue eyes.

He gulped and felt his eyes going wide. “When?”

Anna chuckled a little harshly at that. “N-now. It's kinda been a rough day.”

Patting the spot right next to him, Titus watched and tried to remain calm as Anna not only sat down beside him but also laid down onto the couch, pulling his arm so that he didn't have a choice in whether he wanted to hold her while sitting or while laying down. He preferred the latter and allowed his entire body to relax into the couch.

His muscles loosened, and his back was cushioned. With Anna right in front of him with her hand holding onto his in a sure grip, Titus found himself the controlled variable once again and didn't mind at all. If this was her way of beginning to build courage and as long as it involved him, he was more than completely fine with it.

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