His Experiment [FIRST EDIT]

Questions

Chapter 21

The run was tense and quiet, neither of us saying a single word. We both knew we were no longer being followed, yet Varian continued to run. I didn’t object because my eyes were looking behind him for any sign of the white van and Him. But all I was able to see was the desolate road and void buildings.

Varian suddenly turned, the light dimming leaving us with the brick walls surrounding us. We were now in an alley, but this time it wasn’t night. We weren’t using the alley to sleep as we usually did, but to hide from the lab coats who only wanted to bring us back to the Lab.

Varian slowly let me down, my feet finally meeting the cold ground instead of the unpredictable air. His eyes met mine and something swelled inside me. The feeling was familiar, one I had grown used to when Varian had first arrived to the Lab. The heated feeling was hatred.

“Why did you do that?” I asked, breaking the silence, my voice ringing out louder than I expected. But I didn’t care whether my voice whispered through the wind or whether it howled; I only wanted to hear Varian explain himself.

But I didn’t allow Varian to voice his answer. There was a need inside me to hurt him, to inflict the pain he’d evasively inflicted upon me. It wanted Varian to know what it was like living a sheltered life only to be thrust out of it abruptly and into the harsh life the Outside offered.

One moment I was staring into Varian’s eyes and the next I found myself screaming at him, demanding him to give me answers. I was sure my screams were loud enough to attract unwanted attention but luckily, at the time, it was only us. It was only me screaming at Varian and Varian only staring back.

I don’t know what drove me to the screaming. I had only screamed once in my life, when He had tortured me. The pain had been unbearable then and had clawed its way through my throat. Now, all my emotions were surfacing, all of them directed towards Varian. He was the source of each emotion and also the one who silenced them.

Varian strode over to me, my own body coiling. I didn’t want him near me. He would only continue to hurt me, whether it was with purpose or accidental. His every move seemed to end with me in pain, every time.

He ignored my cringing and wrapped his arms around me, constricting my movement like a paralyzing serum. I could still feel the screams clawing their way out of my throat, hoping to startle Varian enough to let me go, but he held me with no hesitation. He didn’t even flinch when my nails found their way into his skin and scraped the surface, allowing blood to rise.

The screams descended until they were no more, replaced with salty tears. They didn’t stop, only continued down my face with consistency even as I leaned my head against Varian, suddenly needing his comfort.

I continued crying even as he whispered unintelligible words into my ear and ran his hand up and down my back in an oddly soothing way. The tears started calming down, the only sounds being my muffled hiccups and Varian’s whispering.

This was the most contact I’d ever allowed myself to have with Varian. There was another moment of physical contact in the Lab, but it had been involuntary. This was the first, partially voluntary contact we’d had. I was allowing Varian to comfort me right now. Instead of screaming uselessly and clawing at him, I was leaning against him and letting him silence me.

When I felt I was myself once again, I pulled away, wrapping my own arms around myself. I could only look down at the ground, unable to meet Varian’s eyes. If I did I would notice how blue they were and they would remind me of my door, which would remind me of the Lab. If I remembered the Lab, I would remember that Varian was the reason I wasn’t being transported back there currently and I would become angry all over again.