His Nerdy Red

《Nerdy Red Pt. 28》

/Too Far Gone/

~~
Tears stream down my face as I walk down the street towards my house. This night had been a disaster to say the least. As my house comes into view, I decide I no longer want to go straight home and risk my parents seeing me cry. Too many questions I wouldn't know how to answer.

So instead, I keep walking towards the park. It's dark, and momentarily think that I shouldn't be out this late by myself. But I shove the thought out of my head as quick as it came. It's a bit chiller than I expected, and I regret the decision to only wear a light jacket. I pull it tightly around my frame.

I sit on the nearest bench, and contemplate how hurt I actually am. Him not following me and letting me walk home alone showed me more than it should have. What am I to him, really? Because boyfriend tell their girlfriends true things.

I wipe tears falling freely off my cheeks. I let my hair loose and run my fingers through the course red strands, trying to get my mind off of Parker.

I think I might really be in love with him, but he is so inconsistent. I just want him to be able to talk to me.

Just then I hear leaves crumble under someones feet. I jerk my head to the left to see who's lurking behind me. Parker's bright blue eyes are beaming at me.

"I thought you weren't following?" I say harshly.

"Rylan," he says softly. Taking a seat beside me so that our thighs are side by side. "I should have told you about Zoey. I'm really sorry that I didn't."

I shrug, not really giving him a full answer.

"And as far as lying to you about my dad, I'm sorry about that too. It was easier to say my mom kicked me out, then explain that I just can't be around my dad. I can't look at him," He pauses and I can see anger building in his eyes. "Every time I see him, I'm reminded of how much my mom has struggled."

Even though I haven't totally forgiven Parker, I reach over and grab his hand and hold it in my lap.

He looks at me then, "do you forgive me?"

"Parker, I just want you to be able to tell me things. The truth." I emphasize.

"I will from now on, I promise."

I nod, a sign I've forgiven.

"I'm sorry I ruined tonight." He says.

I laugh, "it was kind of lame anyways."

He laughs too, "it was wasn't?"

"Yeah, the whole night was kind of a bust."

"Not totally," he says grabbing my hand tighter. "You look so beautiful tonight."

I feel my cheeks heat, but my body is cold so I shiver.

"Are you cold?" Parker asks.

"I'm fine," I try to say but he's already taking off his jacket and putting it around my shoulders. "Thanks."

He puts a hand on my cheek angling me towards him. His breathe tickles my neck as he leans closer. He's teasing me, his finger glides along my jawline and stops on my chin. He lifts my chin up so my eyes are focused on his.

"Are you going to kiss me?" I whisper. He smiles so brightly at my question.

"There's my fiery girl." He chuckles, dimples popping out not to be forgotten. His eyes drop from mine to my lips and I feel that familiar feeling in my stomach. Like butterflies learning to fly. My breathe hitches as his lips fall against mine. Parker slowly kisses my lips like he's trying to memorize how they feel against his. He quickens his pace as I kiss him back. Trying to slowly memorize his own soft lips against mine. I never want to forget this feeling.

Suddenly, he hoists me up onto his lap. Wrapping his hands around my waist he pulls me closer so our chests are touching. His lips leave my own, and I audibly groan. He starts kissing along my jaw down my neck and lingers beside my collarbone. I make a noise I've never made before as his hand dips just below the hem of my dress.

"Parker," I say breathlessly.

"Hmm?" he mumbles against my skin.

"I should probably get back home." I don't really want too. I want to stay right her on his lap, and have him show me things I've never thought about doing with anyone else. But I'm also nervous. The thought of me being inexperienced scares me, because I know for a fact Parker is the opposite of inexperienced.

He groans, "just a couple more minutes?" He begs. It's so tempting, but we can't just keep going on this park bench.

"We're in the middle of the park on a bench." I state and he laughs.

"I know, Ry." He places a few more kisses along my collarbone and I get up feeling awkward. I feel frustrated at myself for stopping him. He takes my hand in his and we start walking towards my house. Once we get to my front porch he stops and puts his arm around me and hugs me tight.

"Parker?" I say again.

"Yeah?"

"I want you to know-" I swallow the lump forming in my throat. "I've never..." I trail off not knowing how to tell him. He chuckles lightly.

"I know, Rylan. I don't care. I don't want you to overthink about that. The fact that you've never... you know-" he says not wanting to say it either. Blush spread across my pale face. "It's kinda hot to me. Not going to lie."

I laugh not being able to hide my embarrassment. Even though I'm extremely embarrassed I don't look away from Parker's devilish grin.

Just then the front door opens and my dad peeks his head around the corner. "What's up?" He asks nonchalantly.

"Dad," I groan. "We're just saying goodnight."

"Okay, but it's pretty chilly out here, so-" he says hintly that we should wrap it up.

"Okay, okay. Just a few more minutes."

"Okay," he agrees. He raises an eyebrow at us, eyes Parker, then shuts the door. "I don't want you to leave." I say.

Parker runs his hand down the length of my arm. "I don't have too." He says with a ornery grin.

I roll my eyes. "I wish, my parents will murder you. Then they will soon after murder me. See you tomorrow though?"

"Yes for sure." He says without hesitation.

"Where are you staying tonight?" I ask out if curiousity.

"Tonight I'll stay with Brad again. But tomorrow I'm going to move back inwith my mom again. You made me realize I can't punish my mom for something she didn't do. Will you go with me?"

"Of course," I smile at him.

"Awesome, thank you." He bends down and kisses my cheek. Then, he looks at the front window. "I better go. Plus, you need to go in and get warm."

He lets go of my hand and steps off the porch.

"See you tomorrow." I say.

He begins walking down the street towards his parked car.

"I love you." He shouts lastly.

And for a brief moment I almost say it back.