Lonely -Tsukkiyama

Chapter 2

Yamaguchi's P.O.V

As soon as we walked through my front door, Tsukki went straight to my bedroom and got into my bed.

"Tsukki? You can't just sleep all day."

"It's 8 pm Tadashi, I'm tired. I'm going to sleep." Tsukki rolled over in my bed and closed his eyes, his headphones still wrapped around his head.

"Okay Tsukki." I whispered that last part though, I knew he wouldn't hear me anyway.

I walked into the bathroom that is connected to my large bedroom.

I passed by the mirror and stopped.

Freckles. I hate my freckles. Tsukki used to tell me he liked my freckles. I barley even know Tsukki anymore.

*Flashback*

Second year of Junior High

"Tadashi?" Tsukki walked into my bedroom. I was a mess, I was sitting on my knees staring at myself in the mirror, sobbing.

"Oh uh, hey Tsukki." My voice cracked and I attempted to wipe my tears from my face, but they kept coming. It was no use. "I-I'm fine. Just got something in my eye, you know?"

Tsukki didn't say anything, he just got sat down on the floor next to me and pulled me in for a hug and let me cry.

"Tadashi, don't make up such a stupid lie. I know you're not alright." He rubbed my back to try to sooth me.

"Sorry Tsukki."

We sat there for what felt like hours. Tsukki telling me it was going to be alright while I cried and cried and cried until I couldn't cry anymore.

"Hey Tadashi?"

"Yeah?"

"I, uh, I like your freckles. I think they look nice on your face." Tsukki turned the other way, but I could see his ears turn a bright shade of pink on his pale skin.

"You really think so? I just think they're ugly, I wish I didn't have them." I looked down and my arms and saw the over whelming amount of freckles on my body.

"Of course I do! I think they're so cool! They're like uh...Stars!! Yeah! They're not ugly." Tsukki whispered the last part, probably out of embarrassment. It wasn't normal for Tsukki to be so straightforward about things.

*Flashback Over*

I stared at myself in the mirror, nothing changed since then. I still had an overwhelming amount of freckles on my body, and I still hated them.

They're ugly.

They're ugly.

You're ugly.

No wonder Tsukki doesn't like you anymore, stupid Tadashi, you're too ugly for someone like him.

I felt my eyes begin to sting and my throat closed up, the tears started falling and I began to lose myself.

Why are you so weak, stupid Tadashi? You can't even go a day without crying.

I turned the bathroom light off, I didn't want to look at myself in the mirror. I sat against the door and cried. I cried harder than I've ever cried in my entire life.

"Tsukki I miss you" I sobbed, "I just want my Tsukki back."

I kept crying, I couldn't stop. The pain that was inside of me wouldn't go away. I just wanted it to go away.

Tsukki's P.O.V

I heard him. I didn't want to hear him but I couldn't stop listening.

Do I go in there?

No, if I go in there I will start crying and it will make both of us feel worse.

I'll just wait for him to come to bed.

"Tsukki I miss you" I heard Tadashi cry."I just want my Tsukki back"

After hearing that I felt as If I had been stabbed a hundred time in the heart.

Tadashi I am here! I'm trying! I will meet you again someday soon, I promise.

That's what I wanted to think. I wanted to think I would be happy again sometime soon, but I knew that was't the case. The sadness and loneliness has completely taken over my mind and body, and I couldn't escape.

I put my headphones back over my head and played the loudest music I had. I couldn't listen to this anymore, it makes me too sad.

Suddenly I felt MY eyes begin to water until a single tear fell. That was it. Just one tear.

How long has it been since I've cried? I think it's been a long time?

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

I need to be strong for Tadashi. He's the only one who cares. I need to be strong for Tadashi. For Tadashi. Tadashi.

The bathroom door quietly opened and then closed and Tadashi slipped into bed next to me.

What should I do? Should I tell him I'm awake? No...he would try to hide his feelings.

I'll just wait a few minutes and...

I turned over and wrapped my arm around Tadashi's body. He tensed up for a few seconds and then he relaxed into my grip.

What am I doing? I'm trying to make him feel better but what if this is weird? Oh well...he doesn't seem to mind anyway.

Yamaguchi's P.O.V

I looked at the time on my phone

9:16

Wow..I've been in here a long time. I guess I better go to bed. We have practice in the morning.

I slowly unlocked the bathroom door and walked out, quietly shutting the door behind me.

Tsukki was still sleeping. I felt a deep pang of sadness in my chest. He looks so sad when he sleeps.

I slipped into bed next to tsukki and closed my eyes. Tsukkis breathing was a bit uneven, he was probably having a bad dream.

I was half asleep, and I don't think I was dreaming but Tsukki turned around and wrapped his arm around my body. He was increadably warm. I tensed up for a few seconds. I don't know why, i wasn't uncomfortable, it was just unexpected.

I realized that tsukki was sleeping and he was probably just trying to get comfortable, so I relaxed to his touch and fell into a deeep sleep faster.

•Authors Note•
~Hola it's ya girl log, Another shitty chapter but it took me an hour to write so APPRECIATE IT!! HAHHA jk. Byee ~