Kawaii Chan x Zane: A Broken Meifwa - Zane-Chan

Loosing Character

I had to fix this. I'm not some guy she can just cling on to and... my hold on the door knob loosened.

Who am I kidding?

For the first time in my life, I had actually, genuinely cared about someone. And here I was, the master of evil doing and just being plain rude, now trying to figure out how to fess up my feelings to Kawaii-Chan without her running away in a screaming panic; even if she wouldn't get far- due to her calves. Though... it's quite possible she likes me too. My blue eyes. My dark hair. She's probably head over heels for me. I'm gorgeous.

She's not shallow Zane.

Most of the things I've told her weren't even nice, sweet, kind- or one of those other sickening adjectives she used to describe me at the hospital while sedated. If anything I've made her life miserable then to fix it again. She's the second person I've cared about outside my family in my whole life. I've only started to be a good friend to her.

Good...

The title disgusted me. I was cold, mean and ruthless. Ask anybody.... except Kawaii-Chan. Kawaii-Chan, Kawaii-Chan. She's too sweet. Always talking in that squeaky voice that sounded like Aphmau on high pitch auto tune. Always entering the room offering to make cookies if she hadn't already. We were complete opposites. Well- as my mom has said- opposites attract.

Make up your stupid mind already.

I need to clear my head.

Tuning the knob, I walked out the front door, ignoring Garroth's question as to where I was going. It was quite windy, and the leaves that had turned shades of yellows, reds, and oranges were riding on the wind.

Why the hell do I sound poetic?!

I could make Kawaii-Chan a poem.

Nah.... that's just stupid. This was the first time I liked a girl and I was going to do it right.

"Why are you talking to youself?" A voice said behind me. I turned around. It was Katlyn.
"Oh uhh... Katlyn!" I frowned at my timing of deciding to finally go outside. Never had my assumptions of the outside world being intolerable been so right. I haven't talked to Katelyn since she had apologized to me at the hospital. But things were still awkward. I don't know if it I felt Katelyn didn't actually mean it, or if I was just bad act accepting an apology. It's probably both.
"Look Zane, I know you're weird and all but why are you talking to yourself?" She's already insulting me. Things are just dandy, aren't they?
I frowned. "It's none of your business." I continued walking, refusing to stop to chat. I came outside to clear my head, not be insulted.
Katelyn let out a sigh. "Look Zane, I'm sorry for what I said. I was just being an over baring protective person. And I know that's no excuse but please... I want us to be able to talk again without it being awkward."
"You know, this is really out of character for you, apologizing and all." I grinned as Katelyn let out a huff. "But I'll accept it."
Katelyn nodded and smiled for what I think is actually the first time she has smiled to me. We stopped in front of her house. My thoughts immediately went to the Meifwa. I could see her from where I stood, through a second story window. She leaned against the window. She saw me and she gave a small wave. I waved back.
"I'll bet you're wondering how Kawaii-Chan's doing, huh?" Katelyn asked, she started to walk toward the front door, probably the invite me in.
"Yea..."
"And I'll bet that you've been thinking about her lately too."
"Yea..."
"You really like Kawaii-Chan don't you?"
"Yea... Wait what?"
"You like Kawaii-Chan." Katelyn repeated, completely unaware that that would be my answer. "Aphmau!" She ran toward the house right before I had the sense to hold her back.
"Please don't tell! If anyone's going to admit to Kawaii-Chan it's me!"
"You know," Katelyn said, "You begging is really out of character for you."
I grumbled under my breath and tried to think of something to get Katelyn to keep her mouth shut. Because if Aphmau were to find out... who knows what kind of crazy girl screams would come out of her mouth. "Look Katelyn, you better not tell anyone or else."
"Or else what?"
....

"Just or else! Now go on inside and keep your mouth shut!"
"Fine. But let me tell you something Zane. If you do anything to hurt Kawaii-Chan, I'll pound you."
"I know that." I sighed. I didn't want go through the big brother talk- well in this case bug sister.
"And if you- what?" My answer had caught Katelyn completely off guard. I have become quite good at catching people off guard lately.
"I don't know if you've noticed this Katelyn, but it seems that I've developed a heart. Whether I like it or not." Clearing my head didn't have to be me taking in the fresh air. It turns out I could spill all my worries to someone I don't even like that much.
"You?" Katelynn, like always doesn't believe a word from anyones mouth. "Yes me." I frowned. Katelyn seemed to be analyzing my face. And I had to admit, it was kind of creepy.
"You're scared." She said.
"Me? Scared? Of what?" I laughed.
"You're scared you're loosing your character. You're scared you'll have to choose between your own character and Kawaii-Chan. You're loosing your own character for Kawaii-Chan and you don't know what to do."