Blinded

Chapter Thirty-seven

As Long As I'm With You

Masuyo kong binuksan ang pintuan ng silid na matagal ko ng hindi napasukan.

It's still the same. That spotlight and the grand piano in the middle of the stage. I wonder if mayroong pumapasok dito. I bet no one would ever dare to enter here. The darkness here is too overwhelming. The seats were just too creepy.

Diretso akong tumuntong sa entablado. May puting telang nakapatong sa grand piano na wari'y takip para maiwasang madumihan.

I missed this. I missed how my life works back then. Darkness embracing me upon seemed to be so good compared to what light is giving me right now.

I always want a simple life. Less drama, less shit. But I just can't have one, can I? Maybe this is how life works. We just have to deal with it.

No matter how it pains and agonizes you, you still have to keep going. Because the world will never stop rotating just for your sick fuckeries in life.

And that's what I learned. Really. The world don't give a fuck about your loneliness. It's yourself whom you can trust and hold on until the end.

I heaved a sigh and sat on the chair. My fingers made their way to the keyboard and I closed my eyes. To be totally engulfed by darkness.

(Play: River Flows in You (piano) by Yiruma)

This is my kind of life. Ganito ako. Ito ako. Bulag at ignorante sa lahat ng bagay. Truly, innocence is a bliss. And it could be taken away in just an instant. How I wish I could turn back time. How I wish I could be this happy.

No drama. No shits. No light. Just darkness.

"I want to move on. So bad. Believe me I tried." Napatigalgal ako at napatigil sa pagtipa ng marinig ang boses na iyon. I never expected that he'll come here. Did he follow me?

Of course. Life always give me lemons.

What do I expect? Light will bring him here of course. Just to torture me. Yes, I planned and I want to hear him but not now. Pakiramdam ko hindi pa ako tapos kay Jameson. I want him to understand first my situation before I could go straight to Alec.

"Then you did not tried hard enough." I answered. Those pair of deep and mysterious eyes. They were like a maze. Na kapag tinitigan mo ay tila nakakaliyo at nakakawala ng sarili. Nakakasira ng sistema.

"I guess so." He replied and walked towards me. Inayos ko ang upo ko at sinakop ang upuan.

Like seriously, Demetria? Why on earth would you think that he'll sat beside you?

I remained calm and composed completely ignoring my pounding heart and my screaming mind.

He stop midway. Siguro'y napansin niya ang pag-ayos ko ng upo at pag-spread ng bahagya ng aking mga hita para sakupin ang upuan. Ngumuso siya at naglakad palapit sa'kin. He stopped right in front of me.

Sinarado niya ang takip ng keyboard at saka siya umupo doon. Tumingala ako sakaniya at ang nakakaurat-sistema niyang tingin ang sumalubong sa'kin.

"Maybe you're right. Maybe I didn't tried hard enough." He said. I pursed my lips and tilted my head.

"Or... You never tried because there's really nothing to move on to. Right?" I added. His brows furrowed. Ganoon na lamang ang tahip ng aking puso ng makita ang mukha niyang halos hindi na maipinta dahil sa galit at pagkainis.