Codependent [Zarry AU]

9. Ignoring Feelings

It had been 5weeks. 5weeks since the Christmas Night. 5 weeks since they had, well, Zayn had decided that it was best to stop the kissing and just be friends like before, 'cause at the end it will complicate things in their friendship which they didn't want.

Harry was a little sad but he understood what Zayn was saying. 'Cause he couldn't deny the fact, he had started developing feelings for Zayn which he was sure as hell Zayn didn't return. If there was anything Harry was scared of, it was rejection. He had gone through that with Liam once, he couldn't go through that again, specially with Zayn, his best friend. It would ruin everything and he couldn't afford losing Zayn. Never.

Little did he know, Zayn was thinking the same.

It had been 3weeks since Zayn's birthday. It was a small house party containing Niall, Andrew, liam, Louis, Zayn and Harry. They chatted up a lot and caught up what they had missed. Both the couples said how much fun they had in Ireland and how both of them had kissed at dot 12.00 on 1st January, making Zayn and Harry smile sadly. Zayn and Harry both wanted to kiss at 12.00 but none of them had the courage thinking, the other might not like. So they had ended up kissing each other's  cheeks instead like they usually do on the New Year.

It had been 2 weeks 2 days since they had returned from their 2nights 3days long Paris trip which was a gift from Harry to Zayn on his Birthday. And Zayn couldn't be more Happier. It was his dream to go to Paris. And Harry was happy seeing Zayn happy.

Harry couldn't ever forget Zayn's face at the moment when they landed down on Paris, the way his face lit up. He still remembered how they had spend their whole day goofing around in their shared room and after that, sight seeing. They had spend all their 3 nights playing pillow fight and staying up late talking about everything and nothing. Quite like they used to do when they were younger.

Zayn couldn't erase the memory how Harry became like a giggly teenage girl when they started little shopping for their families with the money they had saved up together for special occasions.
And they couldn't ever forget the moment when Zayn had accidentally slipped and landed on top of him while they were chasing after each other in their room, laughing. Both of their breaths hitched at the proximity and before they knew it, they had closed their eyes and started leaning in. They were just a millimeter away from touching each other's lips with their own and kiss, when the room service decided to knock on their closed door, startling them. Flushing red, Zayn had quickly pulled away and stood up, holding out a hand to Harry after that to do the same. Blushing, Harry quickly took his hand, ignoring the tingles he felt through his body and quickly stood up. Zayn went to open the door and took their dinner and both the friends ate their dinner in silence. None of them tried to break it either. That night they slept on each other's side, keeping a good amount of distance but in the morning when they woke up, it was like, they were glued to each other. Harry was cuddled up in Zayn's arms and was holding him close. That day, they realised, it was impossible for both them to stay away from each other. Smiling, they had greeted each other good morning like they usually do and got ready quickly to catch their flight back to their home, well apartment, after having a quick breakfast and checking out of the hotel.

It had been 2 weeks since they had started University after their winter break.

Being in the University was another story. Zayn and Harry never knew it would be this difficult.

Like, when Zayn would give Harry his piggyback rides to their classes, Harry never knew it would be this difficult not to nuzzle his face in the crook of his neck, kissing and biting the skin there. Zayn's scent was intoxicating.

Zayn never knew it would be this difficult to held Harry by his bum and not to squeeze it tightly. It took his all will power not to turn and kiss his breath away when Harry had nuzzled his face in the crook of his neck like usual.

And both of them for sure didn't knew it would be that difficult to ignore the comments about how cute and good they both look together and how cute of boyfriends they were. Zayn and Harry both never bothered by the rumours of them being together, but they didn't know why they were bothering them now.

At first they ignored them like usual, thinking it was nothing. But as the days passed they understood why it had started bothering them so much.

They had started liking each other.

But none of then knew, the other felt the same thing.

So they did the most stupidest thing ever. They started ignoring each other. Thinking, it would lessen the liking.

Harry had started taking the couch in the nights and Zayn never questioned it. Though, sometimes, he would say, "Harry, you take the bed today, I'll take the couch" and would agree silently, not questioning him back.

But they couldn't ignore the cold feeling they felt at night without having the other by their sides.

Sometimes, Harry would snuggle close to the teddy Zayn had gifted him, pretending it to be him, but it was not. On the other hand, Zayn would secretly stole one of Harry's shirt from the closet and sleep hugging it, but it was not enough.

They felt empty.

And they knew, there was no way anyone else could fill the empty space. Only Zayn for Harry and Harry for Zayn could fill that space.

It was 30th January, the day before Harry's birthday. Zayn was watching some telly in the living room while Harry was doing some of his homework in their bedroom. Zayn felt empty. Usually Harry would always be there by his side, snuggling up to him but not this time. It was like, they had distanced themselves from each other on their own will. They wouldn't even have dinner together and it was stupid. Seeing both of them knew they had started feeling something for each other, without the other knowing.

They had started liking each other. They both knew it but were too stubborn and scared to make a move.

But Zayn knew, he had to do something about it. It couldn't keep on going forever. They are best friends for God's sake. This, ignoring each other and all had to stop and if it means he had to make a move then be it. What most could happen? Getting rejected? By your own best friend? Then be it. It couldn't hurt more than it already is, he thought.

Sighing, Zayn looked up at the vintage clock that was beside the television, on the wall, A gift from Niall and Andrew on his birthday.

11.58 P.M. it said.

Taking another deep breath he stood up from the couch and started making his way towards the bedroom.

It's now or never.

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Dedicated to: SamanthaAMMY zarryslovrrr love-n-war piggypie213 zaynpsyco thank you so much for supporting in every step of this fanfic guys. I love you all (including all the voters and readers) so much.

xsummertime_x get well soon babe, I love you. Miss you. :(