Chapter Four • Kaleidoscope

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Stallion Brown

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Stallion Brown


I sympathized for the young and flustered hearts that don't know what they need because all they've ever had was the false affection. They leave their guards up 24/7 and never want to put them down because they are afraid of heart failure-- there are no crash carts with me. I feel as if I'm the real deal when it comes to affection and love, I make love more than I have sex.

My last real relationship had to have been when I was 18. Freshman year of college, that was back in 99'. I remember those days like they remember me. I thought I was in love, I quickly fell out of whatever feelings when a couple girls I was dealing with on the side told me they were pregnant. I began to believe love is scary and vigorous-- this is not what I want. In an eighteen-year-old brain, I walked away from those situations. I didn't want to know the truth so I avoided them, but deep down inside I knew those babies weren't mine.

My girlfriend Vahl Mae, wanted nothing to do with me. I'd see her in majority of my classes because our major was very similar, and she dropped all her classes and changed her major. I wasn't sure at the time what really hurt Vahl, until now.

I pressured Vahl into thinking I'd be her man and we'd be happy. I told her she had nothing to worry about. I told her to invest all her trust into my worth and that me taking her virginity was alright. When two people are having sex, you get attached on an emotional level and it's hard to say no or goodbye. Some don't understand how hard it is, it always depends on how deep the relationship is already.

Clearly ours wasn't that deep since I haven't seen Vahl in about seventeen years.

It was a few months ago when I finished grad school and wanted to go to some convention in Texas. Vahl had just happened to be one of the coordinators I met. That day hit home for me.

After paying my fees I resided to a coffee shop on the left hand side of the food court. My mind raced back to last night in first class. I chuckled to myself without drawing attention-- I was so gone. Drunk was an understatement, I think I was passed out in the taxi cab on the way to the hotel. I believe I got a good nights rest in the executive suite.

Stepping to the counter I placed down a twenty and got my usual. Blueberry muffin, black coffee, two creams, no sugar. My order was up for grabs on the side counter moments later. I figured I needed to check in soon with my coordinators, so I went to do that next.

The line went swiftly as ten or so coordinators kept the lines steady. I was next up, I sat my muffin on the counter and reached for my wallet in my back pocket to pull out my drivers license.

"Oh my God." The feminine voice called out, I tucked my fleshy lips in to moisten them, my jawbone clenching and shifting, then my eyes aligning to the woman in front of me.

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