Not real.

Chapter Twenty: After Being Asleep...

*Gale*
   After being asleep for a month, you start to appreciate literally everything. I remember missing being able to walk, talk, breathe, or even open my eyes on my own. I have a new appreciation for blind people after living in the dark.
   I think the not speaking was the hardest part of it all though. Because as much as I missed being able to see things around me, the one thing that I need I've already memorized all her features. I've spent years committing her to my memory. Every curve and edge and color. I've learned which tone of voice matches which emotion. I wouldn't need to even see her to know she is amazing, beautiful, talented, stubborn, determined, and a million other words that I could never dream of.
   It was just not being able to speak to her was what nearly killed me in the end. Not being able to tell her I was okay or that everything was going to be fine. When she told me she loved me when I was asleep I wanted with every fiber of my being to say it back. My mind screamed at my brain to work, to say something. But I couldn't. And in that moment my worst fear almost became a reality. What if I would never be able to tell her? But then a voice whispered to me before my mind completely went blank.
"Your gonna get back to her Gale, don't lose faith."
   It was Nadia. And then soon after, I woke up. I was a little disoriented at first I'm not gonna lie but then my memory came rushing back. And in a blur my family was there embracing me. And then there she was. Smiling with tears in her eyes. She started to make those little choking sounds that I find adorable. And I got to say I loved her back. All of a sudden she was in my arms again and it felt so good to actually be able to hold her back after all those nights that she stayed with me while I was asleep.
   And here I am now with the most beautiful woman in the world asleep on my chest. And she chose me? When did I get so lucky? Every once in a while I have to remind myself that this is real and I'm not dreaming or something.
   I tighten my arms around her like I used to after a nightmare. She sighs in her sleep and inches herself closer to me. If that's even humanly possible. Planting a kiss on her forehead I begin to close my eyes. Not really tired but just taking it all in. When I open them, Rory stands at the foot of the bed and I my reflexes cause be to tense up.
"Aww look at you two." He smirks at me, speaking in a hushed tone as not to wake Katniss.
"Jealous?" I smirk back.
"Of you!?" He scoffs, "Never! I practically have all the ladies back in district four." He puffs his chest out and examines his biceps, trying to look manly.
"Oh yeah? I'm surprised they didn't follow you down here. Was it a tearful goodbye?"
"Not from me no. I have to keep up my reputation and crying does not fit the profile," his finger circles his face,"No, no the fantastic Rory does not cry, but I said 'Ladies, Ladies please, I'll only be gone for a couple of days I have to go take care of my dumb brother. Girls, you must be strong'" He adds the last part with a dramatic tone and he sniffs, feigning tears. "I practically had to pry them off me getting on the train, but what can I say? No one can resist me." I roll my eyes as he plops luxuriously down into the chair next my hospital bed.
"Aren't you supposed to be asleep?" I ask. "And with mom and the others at Katniss's house?" His smile fades at my question and the tone in the room turns more serious.
"Let's just say I don't sleep like I used to." His gaze turns away from mine. I know how that goes.
"Nightmares?" I ask. He nods. But I can't help but get the feeling there's something else.
"You never told her did you?" I ask. He looks up confused.
"Told who, what?" He asks.
"Told Prim that you liked her." I add. Whispering so I don't provoke Katniss into having a nightmare.
"What?" He scoffs trying to avoid my stare.
"Rory Hawthorne, you do realize that we're brothers right? I can read your mind, you're a horrible liar, and it was obvious from day one. I just didn't say anything to make you embarrassed."
He glares at that last part and I laugh quietly.
"Haha very funny."
"Yeah it is." I say, still smiling at his discomfort.
"Was is that obvious?" He asks, not even daring to make eye contact.
"Bro you would blush every time you saw her. And stutter every time you talked to her."
"Dang it." He leans back in his chair blushing with embarrassment.
"But you're right I never told her." He says looking down at his hands. I don't feel like commenting would really help anything so I keep my mouth shut.
"And I wish I could've manned up and said something but, I don't know I was too scared and she was so mature and perfect and I was just...me." He blows out a deep breath. As he was talking I protectively tightened my grip around Katniss. I can't even imagine her leaving before I was able to tell her I loved her. Come to think of it that's what almost happened.
"I'm sorry..." I whisper, having so much empathy for Rory.
"Yeah me too." He continues to stare at his hands.
"She would've wanted you to move on though Rory."
"Yeah I know," he gives a small laugh but it's quickly replaced by his serious expression,"It just...it still hurts man." I nod, understanding that part completely.
   He gets up from his chair and gently slaps my shoulder.
"I better go back before mom freaks out, and thanks bro. For talking."
"Hey anytime." I tell him seriously.
"Don't get too frisky with your girlfriend." He smirks.
"Says the one with many." I add sarcastically. He shrugs, and with that he leaves. Man that boy worries me.
Katniss shifts and wraps her arm around my torso.
"I had a feeling that kid was gonna be a player." She remarks sleepily. I chuckle and kiss her hair.
"You were awake?"
"You tensed up when he walked in the room. I thought something was wrong. But then you guys were having a bro talk so I decided to keep my mouth shut." I sigh.
"You could've told me you were awake. Rory wouldn't have minded."
She scrunches her face and shakes her head.
"Well you can go to sleep now." I tell her.
"I will when you will, mister 'I just had brain surgery and NEED rest'" She tells me sarcastically.
"Fine." I sigh, no use arguing with her, she'd win this one anyway. And with that I tighten my grip again on her and close my eyes. Her breathing evens out and not soon after my mind slips into unconsciousness as well.