You Experimented On Us!

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They're all right. I'm nothing. I'm not a good Shadowhunter, I will never be. I can't defend myself. That's why Angela and Helen dragged me to the girls bathroom after Rune Study. They started punching and kicking me. Calling me pathetic, useless. I did what I always do in a situation...I ran.

I made sure my face was covered as I ran up to the balcony. I spent most of my day there crying. I wrapped my arms around my knees as I buried my face in them. I can't go back inside the Institute. They'll just make fun of me again and finish what they started.

"Sam." I heard Alec. I didn't look up. "We missed you during practice."

"Leave me alone, Alec." I sobbed.

He sat down next to me, "Are you crying?"

"It's nothing, just go." He tried to unwrap my arms, but I wouldn't budge. "Just go. Tell Jace I'm fine."

"You obviously not if you're crying. Sam, what's wrong?" I didn't say anything. "Does this have to do with Angela and Helen?" I nodded. "Look, whatever they said, don't let it get to you. They're just trying to make them feel good about themselves."

"Well, they did one hell of a job at it."

Alec tried to move my arms away again but I tighten my hold, "Sam, come on, it can't be that bad."

"They said I was stupid, annoying, weak, pathetic, and useless. That I'm not meant to be a Shadowhunter, that I should have died in the fire."

He sighed, "They're just words meant to hurt you. You can't let it get to you." I shook my head. I finally looked up at him and his eyes widen at my bruised face and busted lip. "What happened?"

I let out a shaky breath, "After Rune Study, they dr - dragged me to the girls bathroom and st - started beating me. They punched me, kicked me, they slammed my head against the sink. I d - didn't do anything and they began laughing at my face. That's not the only thing they did." I let out a sob as I tighten the strings on my hood.

"What they do?"

"They wanted to pl - play a joke on me. Angela held me back while Helena got her ser - seraph blade out -"

Alec cut me off, "She's not allowed a blade."

I nodded, "I know. Somehow, she was able to get her hands on one. When Angela held - held me back...." I couldn't finish. I looked down again and started crying again.

Alec gave me a concerned look, "Sam."

I didn't look at him. I loosened the strings on my hood before pulling it down. My hair wasn't that long as it use to be anymore. It was uneven. I mean, you could see the burnt ends. Some hair was shorter than the other.

"They said since I don't act like a Shadowhunter, then I shouldn't look like one." I cried.

Alec looked furious. "We need to tell Jace." He was about to get up, but I grabbed his arm.

"No, no, no. Jace can't know about this."

"They did this you, Sam. He needs to -"

"No. You can't tell him. Please, Alec!"

"And what are you going to tell him when he sees your hair and face like that? You need to tell him."

I cried harder, "I can't! It's bad enough as it is. I don't need it to get worst by Jace getting involved. I'm weak, and if Jace helps that just proves they're right."

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