Screw You, Soulmate

chapter one

"I met my soulmate before I was conceived.
We were nothing but constellations composed of dying stars.
Before the supernovas consumed us, he told me,
"Don't ever feel alone in the years to come.
You may have your doubts, but we'll collide again.
They say the universe is infinite, but my darling,
so is love." "

When I glanced in the mirror, I saw Drew trying to shove a fat baby carrot stick up Ryan's nose.

Now normally, I would freak out because that's just plain wrong. But I spent all day at the coast line with these idiotic people I call friends, playing beach volleyball and running around, so the deliriousness and lack of energy was sinking in quickly. The long car ride was not helping me either. So instead of freaking out, I snorted and leaned against the passenger window. The glass was cool and the sunlight wasn't too harsh, so I kept leaning against it.

Willow, who sat in the sun and tanned all day, barely wasting any energy, was still in her right mind. "Andrew Pomer, that better not be a carrot shoved up Ryan's nose!" she yelled from behind the wheel, scaring us all half to death.

"Jeez, Will, are you trying to make me jam this carrot up Ryan's nose?" Drew asked sarcastically.

Ryan nervously ran his hand through his dark hair. "Um, I'd still like to keep my sense of smell intact, Willow."

Tapping her fingers on the wheel, Willow exclaimed, "Oh, well if I were to make a suggestion, I would suggest that you don't shove something up your nostril in the first place!" She slammed her foot on the brake when she stopped at the next stop sign, jerking us all foreword against our seat belts.

I immediately snapped out of my tired state as a surprised yell came out of everyone's mouth, except Willow's of course.

"What the absolute fuck is wrong with you?" Drew yelled while rubbing his nose, which had rammed in the side of Ryan's forehead. In Drew's fingers, was a snot covered carrot. It had come out of Ryan's nose when Willow stopped the car.

The disgust must have been clear on my face because Andrew said, "Luna, it's not that bad. I mean, who wouldn't want to eat a snot covered carrot?"

"Oh screw off, Drew. Even you wouldn't eat that." I smiled and turned in my seat to look both of them in the eyes. Drew had his fair share of weird and or disgusting moments, but even he wouldn't eat another person's snot on a carrot.

He raised one of his blonde eyebrows. "Want to bet?"

"Five bucks, man," Ryan said before I could.

Slowly, he put the carrot into his mouth, and took a bite out of it. We all laughed loudly at his face. His nose was scrunched up and his eyes went wide. "Why did you let me eat that?" he exclaimed.

Willow, Ryan, and I rolled our eyes. "Oh, shut up," Ryan said as he handed him a five dollar bill.

Drew was chugging a water bottle when we were about to drop him and Ryan off at his house. "It tasted so bad," he whined.

Ryan smacked him on the head lightly. "You're an idiot for eating my snot in the first place."

"Can I just ask why?" Willow questioned.

Scratching the back of his neck, Ryan said, "Well, he thought my left nostril was smaller than my right one and he wanted to make them even."