You're my soldier, Bucky..

Chapter 5 -My own reflection..

Bucky's POV
I stared at my own reflection in the mirror. I had to run away now.
"FUCK!" I yelled out as my metal arm went crashing into the wall.
My breaths were heavy and I could feel my emotions finally taking control over me.
There was no more Winter Soldier.
My tears started coming as I slid down to the floor with my back to the wall.
I sat there trying to remember who Caroline and Steve was. However, I knew that if I ever was caught again I needed to have a way to not forget this information.
So I disguised myself and went out to a store. There, I bought a notebook and a diary with a few bucks I had 'borrowed' from Caroline.
Caroline... The woman I had just stabbed.

I was wondering if she was dead. Thats when I remembered who she was..
I suddenly got a flashback from yesterday.

"B-Bucky.." She breathed out as she started falling to the floor. I quickly slid my metal arm sliding underneath her back to hold her up. I fell to my knees, but I didnt dare to let her body touch the ground. The blood was dripping on the floor, and I saw her getting weaker and weaker.
"James.." She said, reaching up to caress my cheek.
"Caroline?" I asked her, in shock.

Dammit! I thought to myself.
It's her! It's.. it's.. my bestfriend?
She's the only one who constantly tries to reach out to me, or stop me. Even though most of my missions as The Winter Soldier was a mess of a memory in my head, I could remember her. She always tried to reach out to me and bring back, well, me.
And she was the only one who had succeeded doing that.
But yesterday, I ruined that. I probably killed her. The only person who can get me out of the Winter Soldier.
When I got back to outside of the apartment, I noticed all the police cars. I quickly turned on my heels and planned out where I would go.

//Time skip to nighttime\\
Bucky's POV
It was night now. And I hadn't figured out alot. But I was sure of one thing.
I was going to go the hospital.
I'm such a fucking terrible human being. I thought to myself as I got out of the back alley I was hiding in.
As I walked to the streets, I couldnt help but take in all the beautiful things around me. It was a gloomy night, the moon was up and shining. The street lights made it even prettier. I walked until I saw the hospital. I figured out that she was probably protected, so I had to sneak my way in there.

For once, I felt scared. I was fearful for what reaction I would get, if she was still alive. My mind was still a mess and I was scared to get caught. Truth is, I needed help. Help from Steve and Caroline.
Steve, Caroline and I used to be friends. Actually, BEST friends come to think of it.

I stepped inside the hospital and the first person I noticed was Steve. He sat in a chair in the corner of the waiting room.
Fuck. I mumbled under my breath before I sat down, waiting for him to spill the room number to me.
Instead of him, there were two police officers who walked by, and I heard them say the number.
As soon as they walked out, I quickly walked towards the room number which was on my left.
When I got there, there was no one watching her. Not a single soul.
So I looked around before walking slowly into her room.

When I got in there, she was breathing.
Thank god. I said to myself, relieved.
I walked up to her, and she was sleeping so beautifully. A little smile crept upon my lips as I studied her.
It was her.. My bestfriend.. I had found her again...
Suddenly, she slowly opened her eyes. She looked terrified when she saw me.
"Hi.." I said.
"B-Bucky?" She asked.
"Yes.. I'm sorry darling. I'm so fucking sorry." I apologized, feeling tears sting my eyes.
"I-I didnt.. I didnt know what I was doing.. It was the Winter Soldier. I never meant to hurt you.. I'm so fucking sorry." I continued, with tears slipping out of my eyes.
"B-Bucky.. It's.. It's fine." She smiled as she reached up to caress my cheek.
She then took her hands and pull me down towards her, so that we were closer.
"You know.. I'm a super human too. My body will heal itself quicker than anyone. I can't even feel the wound anymore." She said as she slowly took her hands down and slipped up her shirt to reveal the stab wound.
I looked at it amazed. It was already a scar!?
"Holy shit.."Was all I managed to say to her.
"Yeah.." She replied, quietly.
I turned my eyes towards her and looked her straight in her eyes. They were a deep ocean blue again, and all I could do was smile.
She was okay..
Her hands crept around my neck as she pulled me closer.
So close that I could feel her breath on my lips. She was nervous, and so was I.
But then, I kissed her.
Her lips felt as if they were made just to be ontop of mine.
I smiled after the kiss, realizing what had just happened.
She was smiling aswell.
"I'll let you rest now." I said to her, before kissing her forehead and starting to make my way outside of the room.
"Wait.. One more thing." She said.
"What?" I asked.
"Where are you going to stay tonight?" She asked, worried.
"I dont know.. I'll have to find something." I said, smiling weakly.
"I'll be back tomorrow. I promise you that." I assured her before sneaking out of the hospital.