Commitment

Chapter Ten

Paula was trying to get through her day as she did normally every other day, as if nothing great had happened. But she was finding it difficult, as she felt far from normal inside, after spending the night with Eddie, and still trying to absorb all that he had told her.

Going about serving customers in the café were she worked, she imagined, and half expected, that everyone would notice she was different now, than the day before, but if they did they made no comment on it, and she wasn't sure if she was relieved or disappointed that something so personally significant that happened in her life overnight, was obviously went on un-noticed in the world around her  in general.  

 Though she imagined if she told anyone about her relationship with Eddie, they might think she was crazy for even getting involved with him, considering he had more or less confessed that he doubted they could even have a future together. But perhaps that was part of the attraction she felt towards him, the craziness and the uncertainty, that lifted her out of her usual mundane lifestyle, and made her feel very much alive in a way she never had done before.

In the end, it made it seem worth the risk.

Eddie, probably wasn't the most attractive, or good looking guy on the planet, but he had an intensity and a self assurance about him that she had never found in other men, and for some reason she felt drawn and fascinated by it. She was flattered that he was interested in her of all people, and that he was no longer just looking at her as his sister's little childhood friend.

She didn't mind in the least keeping their blossoming relationship all to herself, she didn't want to talk about it or share it with anyone. Then she could keep Eddie all to herself, he was her own guilty little secret, and she didn't have to worry about those around her wanting to give their well meaning advice on what she should and shouldn't do, as if she didn't know her own mind.

It was something she had lived with a long time with her grandmother, who had always tried to tell her what was best for her. Then as she got older because of her grandmother's illness, whilst she cared for her, Paula had been contented to go along with everything, and just agree with her grandmother, just to make her life easier.

But now she no longer had that worry. She had become free independent young woman over the last few years, now able to take charge of her own life, and she was starting cherished that more than anything else .

It was another reason why she didn't want to put any pressure on Eddie, or make him feel obligated to her in some way. She had experienced that burden for years with her grandmother, and had no desire for Eddie to feel weighed down with the responsibility towards her. Which was why she was not going to make a big deal out of it, if he didn't phone her, despite the fact she found herself admitting that a tiny part of her inside she still hoped he would.

But she didn't want to build her hopes up, just to be disappointed. So she tried hard not to think about it too much, contenting herself with basking in the memories of the evening before, when they had been together, once  glad she had that at least she had those to recall as she entered her house that evening, realising she would never view her bedroom in the same way ever again. 

But later, just as she was getting ready for bed, and her phone rang. She couldn't answer it quick enough.

"Hey," the sound of Eddie's voice immediately lifted her heart, "I told you I would call "

This made her laugh, "Yes you did, I am sorry for ever doubting you. But I know how your job keeps you occupied as you so blatantly pointed out to me in the early hours of the morning" she reminded him.

"Yeah but even so, sometimes I can take a break and I can catch up with my personal life," Eddie replied with dry humour.

"Lucky for me," Paula returned.