My Name Is Alexander [LAMS]

Baby Don't Cut

"Lex?" John asked, his voice just a thin whisper.

"John I–"

"I'm sorry" He said.

What?

"I don't know what I did but please forgive me. I can't– I have never meant to hurt you Lex, you know that right? I would never. I'm so so sorry for whatever I did Lexy, please forgive me, I'll be a better friend, I'll stay away if you want, I'll give you more attention, just– please. I'm sorry"

Alexander looked at him with wide eyes and an astonished expression. He watched as tears fell from John's beautiful green eyes and knew this was his fault.

"Why are you apologizing? I'm the one that should be saying sorry, I'm the one that should be begging for forgiveness, John you didn't do anything wrong!"

"Then why are you avoiding me!?"

"Because I broke it"

"What?"

"My promise, I–" The took a deep shaky breath and pulled up the sleeve of John's stolen jacked, revealing the tiny red marks covering all of this arm.

John didn't look disappointed, he didn't look mad. He looked sad, hurt. And Alex knew this was his fault.

"Alex" He gasped. "Why?"

"It was too much" He confessed. "I just needed it, one last time. It was just going to be one cut I swear i just...I don't want to be afraid anymore, I don't want to die inside just to breath in. I'm tired of feeling so numb, I just wanted relief, just a little. I–"

"Why didn't you tell me?, why did you avoided me? Alex, you should've told me"

"...I thought you would hate me"

"Peach I would never–" He abruptly cut himself and hugged the boy's small frame. This hand rubbed Alex's fragile arm and sighed.

"I know seems like nobody understands you, that you're on your own and helpless. But you don't have to be alone. I'm here okay? Always"

"Okay" He murmured on John's tear soaked sweater. "Okay"

"Baby don't cut, you can do anything just please don't cut" He whispered pleadingly.

"Okay" He said again, now facing John. "Okay" He said and stood on his tiptoes, pressing his lips against John's.

Okay.