The Intriguing Illogical Ideas of I

Pouring My Heart and Soul onto A Page

I don't really think I've ever talked about this, and I don't think I'll ever talk about it again, but here we go.

I don't know if you know this about me but I do deal with a number of mental health issues, and I'm currently on medication and all that crap. I dunno. I talk about it a lot in person, but I kinda joke about it? All my friends know about it, and I just laugh about it and joke about it.

Smile to hide the pain, right? I don't now. That's how I roll.

See, even right now as I write this, I'm desperately trying to hold myself back from turning this whole chapter into a joke because I don't want this to be a joke chapter, I want to actually kinda try and be serious for once.

But yeah, so I'm having a really hard time at the moment, with everything really. I'm strugging to get out of bed in the morning, and it's almost impossible to find motivation to do anything. It's really taking it's toll on me.

It's the kind of tired that sleep can't fix.

My medication isn't helping and I'm honestly at one of the lowest points that I've ever been at. My friends are really getting frustrated with me and I don't want to lose them to this.

Not to mention I tried to tell my Dad these things, and he told me he was disappointed in me. And that was really hard to hear. Because I'm constantly feeling like I shouldn't feel like this, right? I go to a good school, I have a good job, I have good friends and lots of good hobbies, right?

I don't know. It doesn't really make any sense. I'm just having a hard time at life really.

So yeah, I poured my heart and soul onto a page for you to allow yourself to get an insight into my psyche. I hope you enjoyed your trip here.

Now we shall pretend this chapter doesn't exist.

----- ZOE OUT -----