25. Messy

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(Will)
I stared while the little white pill dissolved in the glass of water. I'd taken Nico to the bedroom hours ago because when I finally woke up, I almost lost myself. My throat felt so dry. My body felt so weak.

I put the glass to my mouth, but stopped before the liquid reached my lips. What's the point? I'd just throw it up later anyway. I'd still feel just as bad, if not worst, than I did now. Why wouldn't the damn tablet work for me? Was it really so wrong to go against my own nature?

A horrifying thought flickered through my mind.

Nico was sleeping, defenseless, in the bedroom. It would be so easy. I knew I would ultimately hate myself for it, but my throat was so dry...

Go ahead.

My eyes widened. "Nico, no..." I said out loud, "I know you can't mean that."

Will.

"No!" I put my hands over my ears, though I knew it wouldn't keep him from saying these stupid things.

Will, I can feel how thirsty you are. I can feel how dry your throat is. Please, don't make yourself suffer for such a stupid reason. It's okay. Just do what you have to.

I felt tears welled up in my eyes. My voice shook. "Nico..."

I stared at my reflection for an eternity before eventually giving in to the primitive side of my subconscious and walked to the bedroom. There he was, that adorable boy just lying there, his deep brown eyes half opened. He sat up when he noticed me. He said nothing. His expression was soft, like he somehow understood my struggle. His head was slightly tilted as if he were trying to overstate without saying it that it was okay.

Ironically, it just made me feel more guilty. He looked like cornered prey, like he'd accepted his fate. I hated it. How could I consciously bite into this boy's neck? How could I drink his blood? Why did it have to be this way?

I fell to my knees, overwhelmed by this self hatred. I shook my head, staring at the floor. "I just can't do it." My voice came out horse, so I put my hand to my throat. It hurt to swallow.

I heard the sound of the bed creaking. Then Nico knelt down in front of me.

"If you're in so much pain, just do it." He made sound so...simple. But this wasn't simple. Nothing about this was simple.

"Stop saying things like that!" I squeezed my eyes shut. "Everything about this is just...wrong..." A few tears slipped past my eye and fell to the floor.

Nico moved closer and lifted my chin. "There's nothing wrong with wanting to live. You're going to starve yourself to death if you keep this up. You're too skinny as it is, and this is coming from me of all people." I felt his hand move through my hair. He pulled my face to the base of his neck. "Look, it's not like I'll hold it against you. Just get over with, okay?"

In this position, I lost the ability to think. My hands gripped at the back of his shirt, and then my fangs were buried in his neck.

(Nico)
"Tch," was the only sound I allowed to escape my mouth. It hurt like hell, and the sound of Will's deep gulps reverberated through my ear; it was just as terrifying as ever, really. Despite that, I smiled, closing my eyes while I ran my finger through his soft hair.

I almost cried when I thought of what I might have done in this situation before I got here. I probably would have laughed at him back then. I probably would have watched him suffer, then killed him. I would have scoffed at his attempt to mimic human emotions. After all, I only saw vampires as beasts in human form back then. I'd wanted to kill them all. All I wanted back then was revenge. And now here I was, growing light headed as I practically forced this vampire to drink my blood to keep him healthy. I laughed quietly at the thought. I wanted to keep a vampire healthy. Where did that change of heart even come from?

I closed my eyes contently when the familiar wave of exhaustion hit me, and I rested my head on Will's shoulder. Oh well. Who really cares right now?

I wondered what would happen if I died here. Will would probably never forgive himself, but I didn't think it was a very bad way to go. My entire family had been killed by vampires. It only made sense that I would be too. Not only that, but at least this would be on my own terms. That was all I could ask for, really.

Just as my consciousness started to sip, I felt Will pull away, his warm mouth replaced by his cool fingers. I felt the wound heal, and my blood replenished itself in seconds. All I could do was laugh when I opened my eyes.

My blood ran down his neck and stained his white shirt. "Look at you," I said, "so messy." I ruffled his hair playfully.

Will half glared at me. "Idiot. I almost killed you."

"That's fine." I gave him a sweet smile.

"No, it's–"

"Fine," I assured him. "How many times do I have to say it? I don't mind, Will. It's okay." I used my sleeve to wipe the blood away from his mouth.

He stared at me like I was a microscopic jigsaw puzzle with a thousand pieces. He shook his head. "I don't get you. Idiot." His lips suddenly touched mine. It didn't take me long to respond.

It was a kiss in the purest form of the word. Lips brushing, breath mixing, hands roaming, tongues intertwining. His fangs would occasionally brush against my lower lip or tongue, and it only added to the excitement.

"So," said a feminine voice at the doorway started, "should we come back later?"

Holy Hell, it's been too long.

I am so sorry that I didn't update sooner. Thing is, I literally did not have time to update. A few days after I posted the last one, my cousins came to visit from England, and I was put in charge of keeping them from killing each other. Then I went back home (I was in Ohio with my grandparents for the summer), and school started. Pretty much every class gives homework every night, and it usually takes forever. Last night, I was up until about 2:30 am, and I HAD FORGOTTEN ABOUT SOME! It looks like freshman year is going to be a rough one. Speaking of homework, I still have some of that do left to do, so yeah.

I'll try to update as soon as I can!

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