Curse Words «» Oney X Reader

/15/

"Hi Ryan" I said, the nervousness pouring out through my voice. He furrowed his eyebrows in almost a sad manner. Deep down I knew that this talk was going to have to come sometime, but I did not want it to be now. I kept telling myself it wouldn't be now.

"What are you two doing?" he asked, adding a small little laugh to show he wasn't upset.

In all honestly I wanted to spit it all out to him. I wanted to cry to him and let him hug me like we used to when we were younger. But I knew that it wouldn't happen. Not now, and probably not again.

"We were just going out" I sighed with a smile. He pushed past us slowly and set the water on the counter.

"Like, on a date?" He asked. He wasn't facing us anymore. I took my arm out of the loop of Chris' arm and walked towards him.

"No way!" I laughed, glad he wasn't seeing the expression on my face. I gulped. "Just to grab a bite to eat. We didn't know you were going to be back so soon"

"Is it bad I was back? Did you not want me to go?" He asked. He still refused to look my direction. I ran my hands viciously across my face.

"Why are you acting like this?"

"Because this was supposed to be for us, Y/n! I asked you to be here because I missed you, and now you're going out with Chris! What have we done together? Not much! We can't even record together. That was the least of my plans and we barely got to that. So, yeah, I'm kind of upset" he exclaimed. He had spun around and faced me, his cheeks bright red. He wasn't going to cry. I was.

"Why didn't you tell me you felt this way?" I asked softly. He huffed.

"I assumed you knew and you were just ignoring me. We've known each other forever! Why couldn't you see that?" He cried out. Matt crept silently from his room to see what was going on. Chris hadn't moved.

I felt so guilty. Why hadn't I seen it? Why hadn't I seen that he just wanted to spend time with me?

"You're right, I'm a fucking moron. I should have seen it. I'm so, so sorry. There's no way in hell we are not spending my last days here together" I sighed out. I quickly wiped a newly dropped tear to hide the fact I knew that I would miss more than one person.

The door behind me shut and so did Matt's. I pulled Ryan in a hug and he hugged me back. I sniffed into his shoulder and swallowed back all my tears.

Soon we were watching some old, stupid movie on the couch. It had been an hour and Matt had come out to get something to eat. Chris hadn't come back. I assumed he went to Julian and DD's for the night. I would've done that too.

//

My head was spinning. I was so fucking confused. I figured I shouldn't have been because it was pretty obvious what was going on.

I was crazy. I wanted one of my best friends to be out of the picture just because of a girl? And that girl is HIS best friend. I sighed.

"Cry me a wiver, Cwis" Ding Dong grinned. I groaned, already annoyed with the situation. Julian giggled.

"Ryan likes her"

"We know. He loves her" Ding Ding said, sounding almost annoyed as I felt. I snatched up my phone to check the time, but I really knew what I was lookin for. I wanted to cry.

I was pathetic and I had come to accept it. This girl made me a sad, pathetic, love struck mess and she probably didn't feel the same.

It was around midnight when I decided I should go back. I didn't want to stay here. I loved the guys, but I needed some time to myself and I thought that they would be asleep when I got back.

\\

I drove as slow as I could back to the apartment. I was reluctant to unlock the door, but I knew I looked like a creep just standing out here.

I walked in and put my keys on the counter. There was soft noise coming from the TV and a pile smooshed in the corner of the couch. I couldn't help but grin.

"Hi Chris" she mumbled, her voice strained and tired. I approached her and took a seat on the opposite side of the couch.

We didn't talk for a long time. She wasn't going to even if I said anything. She was mad at me for leaving her.

She was softly breathing. I looked over and found her sound asleep. I turned off the TV and stretched her out, laying her body so her knees weren't at her chest. I looked at her face and kissed her forehead before going to sleep myself.

I couldn't say I felt totally better, but I was takin big strides in that direction. One more week could be enough time to accomplish that.