For Everything A Reason: A Parmiga Love Story

The last Goodbye

As Evan sat in the chair my eyes filled up with tears everything I had tried to put behind me the past two years came back in that moment. I didn't want to tell Evan about the abortion, or that I saw him and Emma together. As all the memories flooded back into my brain my body fell to the floor and I started sobbing. Evan got up and walked over to me he grabbed my hands and sat me down in the chair. "I think your the one who needs to sit down" he said. I smiled through all the tears. "Evan I never wanted to tell you this. I wanted to avoid this conversation my whole life" I pleaded. "Tai I need to know what happened because I loved you and you left you wouldn't return my calls or texts, and I thought the feelings between you and I were over but as soon as I saw you they came back so I had to lie and get you to come to dinner with me so I could finally know why you left, it's time to have this conversation so whatever I did to you I can fix" he said looking into my eyes, then he brushed my hair behind my ears. "Okay, it all started the night when I told you I was moving to Vera's" I said and Evan nodded. "Well a month later my period never came" I let out a cry. Evans eyes widened. "So the afternoon before the golden globes I took a test, and I was pregnant" I cried even harder. I looked at Evan who started to let out a tear. "That's why you were puking at the globes" He said. I nodded. "I went to your house after to tell you and you were with Emma she got on your lap and started to kiss you" I couldn't control the tears anymore. Neither could Evan. "I told Vera I was pregnant and she asked me what my decision was, and I said I cared for you and your career so I had to get an abortion, so I did" I cried. "Taissa we were going to have a baby" he said through his tears. "Maybe if I hadn't caught you cheating on me" I yelled. "You must not have watched for long because I pushed her off I told her everything I told her I was with you, and me and her were never going to happen" he cried. "Well five months later you guys were together" I screamed. "Because you pushed me away she helped me get over you she made me eat and sleep. I was worried about you then one thing lead to another tai what did you expect" he said. I just shook my head. In my stupidness. "I don't think it's fair you never told me about the baby" he cried. "I didn't think It was fair I had to do it alone" I cried. "I've thought about that baby everyday about how he or she could be in the world right now" I said. "Tai you didn't give me a chance too I wish I was there to make the decision with you to hold your hand to kiss you and tell you everything was going to be okay". He said. Then he did he kissed me over and over "everything's going to be okay" he kept repeating. "I just wish you would have told me" he said. "I thought I was doing the right thing" I whispered back. "You just made assumptions Tai" he said this time with a frustrated tone "How was I supposed to know you weren't fucking Emma because what I saw really looked that way" I responded. "About the baby Tai I would have wanted you to keep it I could care less about what people say all I would have wanted was you and that baby" tears flooded his eyes again. "I don't even know what to say, where do we go from here" I said looking up at him. He was pacing around the room tears streaming down his face and his hands on his head. "I don't care I just want to be with you tonight" he said. "Why you have Emma and I have Freddie" I said. He came over and grabbed my hands "but they didn't have to go through what we have, we deserve each other Taissa" he pleaded. I pulled my hands away from his. "You didn't have to go through anything" I said. "Just let me have you tonight tai for the last time this will be goodbye" he cried. I didn't want to give in I wanted everything to say no, but that's not how I am with Evan. I nodded my head and he moved to my lips then all down my body. We made love for the first time in two years the other times we were just fucking. This time it was sweet, romantic, and I felt loved. It wan't a ten minute I hope emma doesn't find out and done thing. it was a hour we took it slow and enjoyed each others bodies. When we were done evan held me in his arms tight tighter than any other time. He rubbed my back "everything's okay Tai, everything happens for a reason maybe our baby wasn't supposed to be in the world" we both started to cry. "Evan I love you, I always will" I whispered. "I love you so much you'll always be the love of my life" he said. "You deserve Emma" I said. " I know but I'll wait for you and one day Taissa I promise we will be together" he said. "Don't wait around for me let's let things happen the way they should" I said. "Deal" he kissed my lips. "I gotta go Emma's probably flipping her shit" he said getting up and putting his clothes back on. "I know. Evan I'm sorry I got an abortion I regret it every day of my life" I said. "I forgive you Tai" he smiled. He gave me one last kiss then he walked out the door. I waited ten minutes to let everything sink in the I texted Freddie -I'm so sorry it took so long I told him why I stopped talking to him- five minutes later I get a response -I'm coming over- a little later I got a knock on the door. I opened it and there was Freddie with a pint of Ben and Jerry's ice cream, one red flower and a teddy bear. "What's all this" I asked. "I got you Ice cream because I figured your upset, only one rose because I'm sure he always gave you twelve, and the teddy bear just because" he smiled walking into my little kitchen to get a spoon then brought me my ice cream. "Your such a sweet guy" I smiled. "Taissa you don't have to tell be anything that happened" he said. "Thank you I really don't feel like talking about it" I smiled. He walked over and held me I almost moved away because it didn't feel right but I then I remembered Freddie was my boyfriend not Evan. "Let's finish the movie" he said and I nodded.