Sanders Sides One-Shots

Had Enough

Takes place after the "Growing Up" video

Warnings: Lots of crying, stress, Morality gets mad, but that's about all.

Words: 1,296

Anxiety stood in front of the baby blue door that led to Patton's bedroom, his hand outstretched and curled into a fist as he debated whether or not to knock on the door. It had been another day, another video, but something hadn't felt quite right to him. Sure, everything had seemed to resolve itself in the end but Anxiety knew that no one, not even the fun-loving and fatherly Patton could get over a hurtful comment that fast, let alone an entire torrent. Finally, Anxiety heaved a sigh and rapped lightly on the bright door. It immediately swung open to reveal a tired looking Morality, who instantly forced on a smile as he saw the darker trait.

"Hey, kiddo! What are you doing all the way down here?" Patton said with a laugh. A strained laugh. Anxiety said nothing and pushed gently past Morality, shoving his hands deep in his pockets. He glanced around the room quickly, smiling a bit to himself as he noted the bright yellow walls decorated with pictures of Thomas, his friends, and even a few pictures of the four personality traits. Anxiety could hear the blood pumping in his ears and he swallowed nervously, trying to pluck up the courage to talk to Morality. Patton watched the younger trait, his head tilted slightly in confusion.

"I wanted to talk to you about earlier," Anxiety just barely managed to murmur, casting his eyes down in slight shame. Morality immediately stiffened, his smile dropping and his grip on the door handle tightening. He pursed his lips, and as Anxiety met his gaze, he could see that they were swimming slightly.

"I'm fine," Patton said indifferently. "Logan and Roman were just saying how they felt and you know I encourage that. Besides, they fixed everything and apologized!" Patton said with a bit of a cheerful edge. Anxiety nodded with understanding, knowing full well that Morality was trying to convince himself of the fact as much as he was trying to convince Anxiety. The young man looked down, scuffing the ground with his dark sneakers and sighing.

"I-uh-I'm not really good at this sort of thing... You're usually the one that does this, but... I know you're not fine." The room was silent. Patton stared at Anxiety from the door frame, his shoulders slumping. Anxiety couldn't bring himself to meet the usually cheerful man's gaze and kept his eyes down, observing every crack and line in the floor.

"So... you're here to pity me then? Is that it?" came the soft reply. Anxiety quickly shook his head, looking up to see Patton with his head bowed, blinking rapidly as if to fight back tears and leaning heavily against the doorway. Anxiety tensed, watching in discomfort as Patton sniffed and quickly rubbed his eyes. He was never good with feelings, and he hated seeing other people cry.

"N-No, I just... Do you want to talk? About anything? You always listen to us, so I just thought..." Anxiety's voice trailed off. Patton gave a shaky sigh and looked up him with a watery smile, nodding and shrugging helplessly.

"Sure, kiddo. I hope I don't sound too rude. I just... I'm not supposed to be like this! I'm supposed to be happy, and fun, and forgiving, but... b-but I can't stop thinking about what they said..." Morality's voice grew softer as he spoke and Anxiety's eyes softened, only slightly, as a tear slipped down the other trait's cheek. Patton quickly wiped it away, shaking his head and groaning. Anxiety started to say something when Patton's eyes suddenly hardened and he looked Anxiety dead in the eye with an angry expression.

"I'm the heart, right? Forgiveness starts at the heart. I shouldn't be so upset about this. It's my job as Morality to forgive, forget, and just keep on smiling! Well, I've had enough of that! Sometimes I just... I just want to be able to get angry at somebody! To shout and scream at them, and make them sorry for ever hurting Thomas, or me, or anyone! I've had enough of being the 'nice guy'!" Patton snapped. More tears were slowly making their way down his cheeks and Anxiety stayed silent, waiting for him to finish venting out on him.

"Those two drive me up the wall! They're always causing Thomas trouble, making him do stupid things or stressing him out too much, and then they have the nerve to accuse me of holding him back!" Patton let out a choked laugh that sounded more like a sob, his shoulders beginning to shake. "Those things they said to me... Telling me there was no point in Thomas following me if it got him nowhere, saying that I'm only ever silly, that I should leave EVERYTHING TO THEM! THEY MIGHT AS WELL HAVE SAID I SHOULDN'T EXIST!" Patton was shouting now, his eyes clenched shut as ran his hands through his hair, gripping it tight and trying not to completely lose it.

"Whoa, hey, calm down," Anxiety said quickly, holding his arms out in front of him, slightly panicked. "They never said that. They would never say that! Thomas needs you, okay? You're important." Anxiety saw Patton's shoulders relax slightly and got hopeful, but then the other trait burst into tears, burying his face in his hands and shaking his head. Anxiety blinked, taken aback, and stood awkwardly as Patton sobbed into his hands. He chewed on his lip nervously, not quite knowing what to do, before sighing and grudgingly opening his arms in a welcoming gesture.

"Do you need a hug?" Anxiety grumbled, looking at Morality with a bored expression. Still sobbing softly, Patton nodded practically leaped into Anxiety's arms, burying his face in his shoulder and hugging him so tightly Anxiety felt like he couldn't breathe. He awkwardly returned the embrace, patting Patton on the back.

"I've had enough, I've had enough, I've had enough," Morality whimpered over and over again. Anxiety felt his eyes stinging despite himself and he brought Patton closer, close enough to feel the trembling in his taut shoulders and hear the quiet sobs he was trying to suppress. Anxiety wanted to let go, his mind screaming at him that he was just going to make everything worse, cause even more problems, but he knew Patton probably wouldn't let him go even if he tried to back away. He was right. Patton had never felt so cared for in his life, and he wasn't about to let the moment slip by. He could feel how uncomfortable Anxiety was, but he couldn't bring himself to let go. Anxiety could feel Patton starting to relax, his shoulders ceasing to shake, but he was still crying silently.

"Maybe they're right," Patton mumbled into Anxiety's shoulder. "Maybe I am holding Thomas back... maybe I shouldn't exist." He immediately regretted opening his mouth as Anxiety backed away from him in alarm, still gripping his shoulders tightly and staring at him with disbelief.

"Hey, don't start that stuff on me. It's my job to worry about things like that, not yours," Anxiety said, half-jokingly. Morality smiled ever so slightly.

"I guess... Thanks," Patton sighed. Anxiety gave the other trait a half smile and patted his shoulder before letting his hands return to his sides. "It's nice knowing somebody notices when I'm sad, even if it's you," he added sheepishly, making Anxiety chuckle.

"Well, I figured since I didn't do anything while we were filming I should check on you now. If you need to talk, you know where to find me," Anxiety said, the words feeling alien on his tongue. Patton laughed and Anxiety mentally sagged with relief at the long-awaited sound.

"I'll be sure to keep that in mind, kiddo."