I'm Here to Fix You - Broken Souls Series #2

Doomed from the start

CHAPTER 15 - DOOMED FROM THE START

SILVIA'S POV

When he leaned in, I held my breaths for some reason. "Maybe you're right, but what do I do when she's my one yet I'm not hers?"

Hard to miss such a heavy hint, damnit. This whole night, this whole freaking night, it was a damn confirm that Tess is right ... Jake definitely doesn't see me only as a friend, even I can realize that now. And it's not even just about sex, it's way more than that. I could feel it in the way his gaze never left me.

It wasn't sexual. Or rather, not only sexual. That wasn't the gaze of a friend, nor of a guy that wants merely to sleep with you. It was ... intense. It was the gaze of a man that knows he can't have you and it tortures him. It was the gaze of a man that would give anything to have even only one chance with you.

I suppose that's why, as my eyes fell on his lips for a split second, my tongue slipped: "You prove her wrong."

It was a mere whisper, but Jake heard me, oh, he did ... because he tightened his grip on me, and leaned closer, his features showing not just surprise, also ... hope. But, like someone said, hope is only a tease designed to prevent us accepting reality.

Jake leaned in further, enough to graze my lips, and I unconsciously closed my eyes. Every muscle of my body was petrified, no matter how much I wanted to move, I just couldn't. What is it with this man? How can he freeze me in my spot like this every time? How can he just command my body to obey him and only him no matter what I want? How can he have such an effect on me, no matter what I feel?

His arms slid around me, and he pushed me against the balustrade, somewhat eager, yet gentle, as if he were desperately trying to keep control over himself, yet he was craving to have more. Do I affect him that much? Duh, of course I do ... it's odd, but you seriously think I didn't feel the boner against my thigh? I'm virgin, not stupid. Even the most respectable guy, if he's into you, if you arouse him, it's obvious he'll have a physiological reaction. Ryan too does, he ...

Shit.

Before Jake's lips could actually come in contact with mine, I slid out of his grip, disgusted with myself. How could I do this? How could I get to this without thinking of Ryan?

I raked a hand over my face, sighing. This is so absurd. "What ... what is it with you, Jake? Why do you do this to me? Why are you always ... what ... ughhhh!" I nearly twisted my wrist by punching the balustrade out of anger.

This is so ridiculous, so goddamn absurd. And these stupid shoes hurt like hell. Out of anger at myself more than anything, I slipped them off and threw them past him, letting them clatter against the glass window behind him, which inevitably broke. Jake didn't even seem to bother. Hell, he didn't seem surprised at all.

And why would he be? Of course he knows the effect he has on me. Of course he knows my brain goes in overdrive every time he touches me, of course he knows I can't think straight when his hands are on me. Of fucking course he knows I'm attracted to him. He's a bloodhound, didn't he say that? He's all too well trained to this.

Sighing, I closed my eyes and leaned against the balustrade, rubbing the bridge of his nose. The stupid contact lenses Tess had me wear were already hurting my eyes. "I'm sorry."

Surprisingly, he chuckled. "Sorry? Why?" He came to stand right in front of me, I could feel the heat oozing off his smoking hot body. I could feel just a little less cold because he was a mere inch away from me. And I'm not even sure I mean literally.

I pressed my eyelids together when my mouth wanted to betray me and let me moan as he pressed his body against me once again and I felt once more his erection. It's just frustration. I'm sexually frustrated because I'm tired of being a virgin, that's all. That's all it is.