Loves a Fight

Chapter XXXIIII Kains P.O.V

Light shines into the room when I finally open my eyes.
The pain small compared to the feeling in my heart.
Waking up alone without anyone you care about takes a toll.
Memories flash through my head as I strain to remember them all.
Gunshots and confessions all seem to come back, but the reason she's gone never comes back.
Where did she go?
She said she loved me...

Men enter and leave telling me they can't find the only thing that matters to me anymore.
They try so hard and yet they can't find her...
The love of my life vanished into thin air.

Her small frame and pleasant smile all seared into my mind.
No matter what she will be there.
She won't leave my heart and soul.
I won't let her leave...

That night replays in my head every night while I try and sleep all while praying to have a dream about her.
Her holding my body tightly in her arms.
The words she said make my heart shatter all over again.

Laying here staring at the ceiling I think of them all over again.

"Kain!?!" She screams my name while running to me.
Oh God...
She slides to my side and wrapped me in her arms.
She looks into my eyes with her beautiful green ones.
Everything just flipped around.
I was the one now dieing in her arms.
There is nothing I can do...

I reach up and cup her cheek looking at her with all my love present.

"Your ok..." I try and talk, but it hurts
I try and show her how happy I am with my eyes but fail miserably.
I showed her how much I cared while it lasted.
I showed her she deserved to be loved.

"Kain..." She cries out and pulls me closer to her.
Every smile she ever gave me and every time I hurt her all flash through my mind.
There isn't enough time to show her all I ever wanted to show her.

"Your going to be ok Kain... I won't let you die..." She whispers more to herself than to me.
I don't want to die angel...
Her breathing is ragged and shaky.
She leans in and places a soft kiss on my forehead.
I've waited so long for her to return my affection.
This all feels so surreal.

"Kain!" She panic as I try and breathe.
She pulls me even closer, so I wrap my limp arm around her waist.
I will never stop loving this girl.

My eyes feel so heavy so I close them.
Noel cries out and squeezes me tighter.

"Please show me your beautiful eyes Kain..." She whispers as her soft breath fans my face while her thumb rubbed soothing circles under my eyes.
I open my eyes wishing I could feel nothing, but her forever.
Her eyes look so devestated and sad.

Sirens ring in the distance while I just look into my fallen angels eyes.
I promised her so much and now I don't have enough time to keep it.

"When he told me that you..." I try and talk, but fail miserably.
She must be in so much pain...

"I'm ok Kain see..." She smiles a broken smile that breaks my heart.
She takes my hand and places it on her neck.
My heart swells at the gesture.
She hated being touched and now she just let's me touch her.
I feel her heart beat and my eyes soften feeling her pulse.

"I just fine because of you..." She tried to reassure me, but ended up breaking in a small cry.
I try and sit up, but she just pulls me up.
I scan her leg and see the cast.
My eyes look back up into her teary ones with regret.

"I am on so many drugs that I can't even feel it..." She laughs shaking her head at me.
She looks so lost like her heart had just been ripped out.

"I am so sorry..." I whisper trying to apologise, but she stops me.
She closes her eyes as the tears fall freely.
I want to wipe them away, but I can hardly move.

"I am the one who should be sorry Kain. I said you were just like my father. Kain you are nothing like my father...." She cries while she spills her feelings.
I never wanted to hear anything more.

"Kain I need to tell you something ok..." She whispers as I close my eyes softly.

"I love you so much Kain, so please fight for your life ok. I love you so much that it hurts. I have never felt this way about someone Kain. I only feel it with you, so please Kain don't die on me. Everyone is gone. Your all I have" she cries and slowly begins to rock us back and forth.

Everything still fresh in my mind.
Every word she uttered still makes my heart feel complete.
Where is she?
Why did she bail on us?

I sit in my office and stare at my hands.
People have tried to get me to move on.
My boys always send women into my office in hopes I let loose.
Instead I always end up talking to them about Noel.

Every once and a while we get a lead on where she is, but then she disappears.
It's like she doesn't want to be found.

Today it's been a whole year since she has been gone.
I haven't slept one day.
The bags under my eyes are so black it scares people.
My cheeks are sharper because I stopped eating.
Without her I am miserable.
She is my other half...