In love but I hate it

Prologo: Pustahan

In love but I hate it
Alpha Series: 02
A novel written by: Akane

The loveliest time of the day for me is midnight. It’s not because I am nocturnal or anything, I don’t have insomnia or any sleep disorder but for me, midnight is my freedom. I lurked around the mansion, looking for something, someone, kahit na sino, kahit anong bakas at nang wala akong makita ay masaya akong tumakas. Yes, I am an independent twenty – nine- year- old woman pero kailangan ko pang tumakas kapag hatinggabi. Kung si Cinderella, natatapos ang fairytale sa hatinggabi, ako naman nagsisimula ang lahat sa akin nang hatinggabi.

I love the midnight, it screams freedom, party and fun. I needed all of that. Iyon kasi ang break sa trabaho ko. I work in my father’s office as one of his legal consultant. I’m a lawyer by day and a party animal by night but my father and my other colleagues has no idea about what I do at night. Walang pwedeng makaalam – it may affect my father’s reputation.

My father is none other than Elpidio Sihurano. He is going to run as the Vice President of the country next elections. Wala dapat bahid ng dumi sa reputasyon ng Daddy ko. Kung tatanungin naman ako o kahit sino sa pamilya ko, wala naman talagang dumi ang Daddy. He’s a clean politician. Hindi siya nangungurakot, wala siyang kinabibilangang sindikato or kahit na ano, he’s too good but he’s fucking real.

I sometimes feel that I would be my father’s downfall – ako at ang sikretong buhay kong ito. But when I think about it, as long as I don’t do drugs or anything illegal, it wouldn’t hurt.

Finally, I got out of the mansion. I ha to get pass through security. Kapag nakita kasi ako ng mga bodyguards ni Dad, ire-report nila ang ginagawa ko and that would be my doom. When I got out of the mansion, pakiramdam ko nakahinga ako nang sobrang luwag. Agad kong pinuntahan ang lugar kung saan ko tinatago ang gate away car ko – it was a matte black four by four chevy – lalaking – lalaki ang dating ng sasakyan ko, no one would ever think that I am the one driving it.

Agad kong tinahak ang daan patungo sa underground night club na madalas kong puntahan. I haven’t been there for quite sometimes, tatlong linggo rin kasi akong hindi nakalabas dahil busy kami sa pagpaplano ng strategy for Dad’s next press conference. Senator si Dad at siya ang unang tumutuligsa sa gobyerno ngayon. He hates the President’s war against drugs thingy, ayaw lang ni Dad na para bang nagiging legal na lang ang pagpatay ngayon at ang mas kinaayawan niya ay ang mga kabataang “nanlaban” kaya pinatay ng PNP. Ang sabi niya sa akin, kung hindi siya ang kikilos ngayon at kung hindi siya ang magsasalita ukol dito, may magkakalakas daw ba ng loob?

He’s being condemned for what he was doing. But he kept on fighting about what he believes. Iyon ang isang bagay na hinahangaan ko sa Daddy ko. I admire him a lot, and that’s the reason why I keep on hiding this part of my life to him, ayokong ma-disappoint siya sa akin. Ayokong sabihin niyang ako ang pinakamalaking disappointment sa buhay niya, kapag nangyari iyon, mawawalan ng saysay ang paghangang mayroon ako sa kanya because he would think that everything I do are lies and pretend.

I arrived at the underground club. I parked my car in hidden, iyong hindi tanaw sa cctv, iyong hindi ako makikita. Alam ko na ang kalakaran. I’ve been doing this for a long time and I can say that I’m an expert.

Pinapasok agad ako ng bouncer after I showed him my VIP card. Nginitian niya ako at saka binigyan ng shot glass na may sling, pwede ko iyong isabit sa leeg ko. It’s the club’s way to prevent drunk rape which I find very innovative.

Magulo sa loob, everyone was dancing, drinking, some are even grinding at each other, making out, getting high or whatever, they are doing their own thing. I came for the drinks at the bar, doon ako dumiretso.

“Clari!” The bar tender grinned after seeing me. Ibinaba ko ang shot glass ko.

“Tequila please!” I yelled. Agad niyang nilagyan ang baso. I took the shot sabay kuha ng lime. God! It felt so good! It’s intoxicating my soul and my being. I am on my happiest again! Pakiramdam ko isa akong disyertong napakatagal nang di nadiligan!

I took another shot, and another and another hanggang sa natagpuan ko na lang ang sarili kong kumakanta at sumasayaw na rin. I was jumping around feeling the vibe and the hype of people around me. It is so fucking good!

“Oh, look who’s here. Clarita Sihurano.”

My body stiffened after hearing that familiar voice. I saw Paolo Arandia – the biggest jerk on earth.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” I asked him.

“What now? Nabili mo na ba itong bar?” Maangas na sagot niya sa akin. I rolled my eyes. May dalawang babaeng nakaangkla kay Paolo Arandia. Ano pa bang bago? Ayoko talaga sa taong ito. Hindi naman lingid sa kaalaman ko na may gusto siya kay Mary – iyong pinsan ko, but he keeps on fucking around and yet he keeps on chasing Mary.

The last I heard, nagpatayo pa siya ng bahay para lang kay Mariake – which is so out of line dahil may asawa na ang pinsan ko, oo, sa ngayon, hiwalay silang dalawa, may hindi sila pagkakaintindihan but still, I guess, Mary wanted to be with the father of her children, hindi niya man sinasabi, hindi man niya inaamin, I know how much Mary loved that fucker man who calls himself Kairos Vejar, kaya hindi ko talaga maintindihan itong si Paolo. It’s been year  - actually decade na.

“No. I just didn’t think that a lewd man like you can enter here. Akala ko bawal ang hayop dito.”

Naningkit ang mga mata niya, I just grinned at him.

“Luh, nayamot, malamang totoo.” I said. Napatawa na lang ako.

“Nakakapikon kang babae ka.”

“Pikon ka naman noon pa, that’s why natalo kita sa racing, remember last summer?” Lalo ko siyang nginishan. If there’s one thing Paolo Arandia hates the most, it’s losing – lalo na sa babae. Last summer, in Portland, nakaharap ko siya sa isang racing event and my, he turned so red when he lost to me.

“You bitch! I dare you!”

“Dare na naman? Tapos kapag natalo ka, mamumula kang parang kamatis?”

“Ayaw mo? Naduduwag ka?” He asked me.

Ngumisi lang ako.

“Okay deal, ano bang gusto mo?” I asked him.

“Drinking contest. The one who drinks the most wins!” He announced. Parang narinig kami ng buong club, the music died down and everyone stared at us.

Iyong bartender, ni-ready na niya ang lahat. There were twenty shot glasses of different alcohol. Paolo and I stood side by side. In a span of two minutes, we have to drink all of that, at kung sino ang mauunang makaubos, as in ubos talaga, siya ang panalo and I just really want to shove it in his face that I can win over him anytime.

So, we started drinking. I was focusing so much. Iyong mga babae, siyempre, nichi-cheer nila si Paolo. Kesyo gwapo daw ito o kung anuman, I don’t care, I am on my last three, when I was about to take the third of my last, biglang sumigaw si Paolo. Itinaas na niya ang kanyang mga kamay. He has won, and I suddenly felt, dizzy, I lost consciousness.