The Princess Bride

Chapter 12

Before I knew it, I was walking down the aisle of the cathedral, clinging to Papa's arm and praying that I wouldn't trip in front of everyone.

Roberta and hoards of other servants had prepared me for every second of the ceremony, but they'd forgotten the tiny detail of me actually being able to move in the gargantuan dress. It was beautiful of course. In fact, it was the most beautiful dress I'd ever seen - a soft shimmery white, overlaid with a delicate material that had thousands of tiny diamonds sewn into it so that the whole dress sparkled. It was trimmed with a delicate floral design, and I suspected that the gold color threaded throughout was actual gold. It was more elaborate and more expensive than any dress I'd ever seen - certainly more so than anything I ever owned, but it was also very big and very heavy. I seriously doubted that I'd have made it down the aisle at all if not for Papa helping me.

Thanks to Roberta's relentless work, I was becoming very good at hiding my misgivings and mild panic attacks behind a genuine looking smile and graceful movements - well, graceful enough anyway - and I'd never been more grateful to the woman than I was at this very moment. If not for that training, I'd have been frozen to the spot once I got a good look at the hundreds - possibly thousands of people waiting for me inside the auditorium.

Papa, obviously able to tell that I was not as confident as I appeared to everyone else, gave my arm a little pat and led me onward.

As I drew nearer to Alex and his dazzling smile, I felt myself relax immensely. Everyone else simply fell away. I wanted this, I reminded myself. I wanted to marry Alex more than anything in the world.

Papa and I reached the point where he was to hand me off to Alex and as he bent to kiss my cheek, for the first time in my life, I noticed tears in my father's eyes. Which, of course, made me have to blink away a few of my own.

I sent him a sad smile and gave his hand a squeeze before I turned and took Alex's offered arm to officially begin my new life.

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After the ceremony, we headed to the ballroom for the reception. Everything was beautiful and the food was wonderful, but all I wanted was to get away from it all. The ceremony had been long anyway, but wearing that dress and being the focal point of so many people for so long, not to mention dancing the obligatory few dances in the aforementioned dress, had left me feeling drained.

I almost didn't want to go anywhere because of my family, but I was also tired and I couldn't wait to leave.

Or almost, I thought, glancing nervously at Alex.

Thanks to Mother filling me in, I knew what was supposed to happen now, and I was more apprehensive than ever. Aside from the embarrassment of having literally every person in the kingdom - including my parents - knowing exactly what we'd be doing, I wasn't sure I wanted to do it at all.

Mother said it would be embarrassing and painful, and that I probably wouldn't like it for a while. Naive as I'd been, I'd known it would be embarrassing, but I hadn't realized it would be so unpleasant otherwise. I couldn't seem to make myself believe that she was right when she said that eventually I'd actually like it.

But what choice did I have really? Not only did Alex expect it, he unquestionably deserved it now. He'd waited and denied himself for years when he didn't have to wait at all. He could have had any woman he wanted, including me, any time he wanted, but he chose to wait out of love and consideration for my feelings. I couldn't deny him now. But what if I hated it? What if I never wanted him to touch me again after tonight? He'd be able to tell without me saying so and I couldn't bear to hurt him that way. More than that, I didn't think I'd have a choice until there was an heir. I was obligated to get pregnant as soon as humanly possible.