I thought of this during my Street Law class, while we were discussing child abuse.
Trigger Warning: Emotional Abuse.
"Izzy, I think I might be gay," a 15 year old Alec told his sister. Izzy gave Alec a huge smile and hugged him tightly.
"I've thought that for a while now, but I didn't want to push you."
Later, Alec sat down with Maryse and Robert. He took a deep breath and said, "I'm not sure exactly how to say this, so I'm just going to come out and say it. I'm gay."
Maryse and Robert both looked shocked. Maryse looked at Robert, who was staring at Alec, "Like hell you are," Robert suddenly shouted at his son. "No son of mine will be gay. We are a normal family."
Maryse tried to calm Robert down. She said to Alec, "Honey, what your father is trying to say is that we have an image within the institute. You need to marry a nice girl and take on as head of the institute in a few years."
Alec was crestfallen. His father's anger upset him. It was obvious that his father would never accept him. He quietly went back to Izzy's room.
"Didn't go well, did it?" Izzy asked, "I could hear Dad from back here."
"He hates me," Alec said.
Izzy placed a hand on her brother's shoulder, "He'll come around. He's our father, he's supposed to love you unconditionally."
Robert never did come around to Alec. Everyday he would look at Alec like he was a disgusting rodent.
"You're a worthless piece of shit, did you know that? You're never going to amount to anything, because you're a queer. You're not normal, do you hear me?" were the words Alec heard from his dad everyday. This was the man who was supposed to support and love him through everything.
Eventually, Alec began to believe his father's words. Maryse tried to help her troubled son, but always seemed to make Alec feel even worse by continuing to remind Alec of the Lightwood image and the institute that he would eventually be in charge of.
It went on like this for a couple years. Alec fell into a depression. He truly believed that he was a worthless piece of shit and wouldn't ever amount to anything. All he cared about was his parabatai, Jace, and the promise of eventually marrying and heading the institute.
Alec was going on a mission with Jace, Clary, Izzy, and even Simon the day he met him. Magnus Bane. He was a warlock—a downworlder, but he took Alec's breath away. There was only one thing standing in Alec's way. His parents. They didn't approve of Alec being gay, so there was absolutely no way they would approve of him dating Magnus, so Alec bottled his feelings and only allowed himself to have a professional relationship with Magnus. Alec became even more depressed when he began to realize Magnus also liked him. The glances and shy smiles told Alec everything.
Alec's feelings for Magnus grew. They were alone one day when Magnus asked him, "Alec, are you gay?"
Alec looked at him in horror when he asked, "Why do you ask?" He tried to avoid the question as his face reddened.
"Well," Magnus' face reddened as he looked down at his shoes, "I was just curious."
An awkward silence fell over the couple. Alec could feel hot tears forming in his eyes as he thought about what he could have with the warlock.
"Alexander, are you okay?" Magnus asked worriedly. He stepped forward to place a comforting hand on Alec's shoulder.
The nickname was Alec's breaking point. Nobody ever used his full name, and hearing it come from Magnus' lips was beautiful to Alec.
"My dad hates me because I'm gay," Alec suddenly said to Magnus.
Magnus looked at him, horrified. He didn't say anything. He knew exactly what Alec needed. Instead, he wrapped his arms around Alec tightly, allowing him to cry onto his shoulder.
"Thank you," Alec said awkwardly after he pulled himself together and let Magnus go.
"I'm here for you, okay? Anytime you need me," Magnus replied.
Alec smiled. The smile brightened Magnus' world. He grabbed Alec and pulled him into a kiss. Alec gladly kissed him back.
They broke apart a few minutes later, slightly breathless.
"Why would my dad hate this?" Alec asked Magnus.
"Who knows?" Magnus shrugged.
"Magnus, I don't know what to do..."
Magnus smiled sweetly, "Alexander, you need to do whatever makes you happy."
Alec smiled back and pulled Alec into another kiss.
"You. You make me happy."
