Heartbroken [COMPLETED]

Chapter 20 - Malaikah

Author's Note

Assalaamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatu hu everyone!

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Today had been my last day of school. Well kind of. We had been given study leave and were only expected to come in for our exams. The closer our exams got the more stressed I was getting. The Zayn and Fatimah thing was not helping matters either. I had done what I had done and I couldn't go back on it. I had never intended to do wrong but it was never about that. It's ironic how sometimes we look at others and we see their actions and automatically assume they are bad people. But when it comes to ourselves we look to our intentions and don't bother owning up for our own actions justifying them with any excuse.

I had almost reached home and as I was unlocking the door I noticed I could hear a faint sound of crying. Quickly I pushed open the door and ran to the living room. My mother was sat there with their hands covering the face.

"Mum, what's wrong? What happened?"

Abruptly, my mum got up and wiped their tears away.

"Nothing, darling. How was school? You're back early."

Oh great. Now my mum was going to change the subject. This always happened. Abdullah and I were always considered too young to be involved in family matters. We never knew anything. I mean I understood why things were kept from Abdullah but me, I was almost 17. Yet still I was regarded as a child who understood nothing. Sometimes I thought I was treated like a child too much and I had missed out on many life experiences just because of the fact that I was protected my whole life. I knew I should be grateful to have a protective family considering some children ended up with broken or abusive families. I knew which one I would prefer.

"Mum, just tell me. I'm not letting this go."

My mother smiled then. She sat back down.

"You're very stubborn child."

I smiled back. I had been told that many times before by many different people.

"Your brother is going to get a divorce."

Divorce.

No, Zayn would never get a divorce. No, I had not ruined my brother's marriage. No, this wasn;'t my fault. No, I hadn't done the wrong thing.

But the more I forced myself and tried to tell myself that I was right to have told my brother, my heart just would not believe it. My lips had become dry and at that moment Abdullah bounded in through the door.

My mum was looking at me concerned.

"Don't worry darling. It is nothing for you to concerned about."

But it was. This whole situation very much concerned me.

My phone had started ringing now and I glanced at the screen. As soon as I noticed who it was, I picked it up immediately. As soon as I spoke, my brother's voice came back. It felt like it had been so long since I heard his voice. He asked me how I was and how my revision was going. But I knew it was leading to something bigger. Zayn was never one to call people ever.

"Look, I wanted to apologise for kicking you out of the house."

I stayed silent. I was the one that should be apologising but the words wouldn't form on my lips. I didn't know what to say.

"Fatimah doesn't live with you anymore." I blurted out.

It was more of a question disguised as a statement. His sigh confirmed it. I felt sick. I knew this was all my fault. I still didn't know if I was in the right or the wrong yet. I wasn't too sure until I saw it all ended up.

"Look Mali. What did I was wrong to you without a doubt. And I'm not justifying it. I guess I lashed out because I kind of had my suspicions."

He paused and I slowly digested what Zayn had just said to me.

"Wait, you knew what Fatimah was doing."

"Well...I never knew the extent of it until after I confronted her but I had had some doubts. Everyone always say a relationship is built on trust so I always used to ignore the nagging feeling in my gut for fear that I was wrong and that I would ruin a good thing."

I didn't know how I was supposed to take it. So I remained quiet and Zayn continued speaking.

"But when you came to me I had no choice but to accept what I was too blind to see. And then I confronted her, the truth came out. She denied it at first but then...And then that's when I told her to leave. And by the time I had returned from home she had gone. I haven't spoken to her in weeks now. But I need to sort it out. We are meeting to discuss this on Saturday but I don't know how we're going to come back from this."

That last sentence stung. Although I knew my brother was not getting at me. Ultimately it had been me who had created this issue. The fact that Zayn knew bothered me a lot. Maybe if I hadn't got involved Fatimah would eventually have stopped her affair and none of this would have ever occurred. I was so lost in my own thoughts that I hadn't even realised that Zayn was still speaking to me.

"I won't be able to afford it. Not on my salary anyway."

"Afford what?" I was slightly confused now.

"The mortgage on the house. I will have to sell it and buy a flat or something."

Something gripped me then. My brother was going to sell his house. He was going to move out of the home he had spent so much money on trying to get. I still remembered the day when he come home smiling declaring to my mum and dad that he and Fatimah had bought a house officially. He had been so happy and now because of me, it was going to be taken away from him. I hadn't even thought this through properly. Of course Zayn wouldn't be able to pay it off by himself especially as Fatimah had always earned lot more than Zayn.

Seriously. What had I done?