Recklessly Bound

Chapter Fifteen

“Hmm, I think the laces are a little bit overdone. How about something less detailed?” Mary says as she observes the wedding gowns. A flute of champagne, a courtesy of the boutique, she’s walking around deciding what gown I should wear next.

We have only three days left to the wedding. The big day when I will officially marry Ethan and yet the man speaking of has taken off the first thing in the morning. I didn’t question him where he’s going or where he’ll be staying, knowing that he’s using the excuse to get some time off with his mistress, or girlfriend, whatever.

"What do you think, Eve?” Mary suddenly engages me in conversation and makes me snap out of my thoughts,

I take a deep breath, looking at the dress the poor assistant is holding for us,

“I don’t like the front,” I simply say.

Mary signals the assistant off and puts her flute back on the tray, “why don’t you go walk around and see if you find anything that you’d like?” she says,

“I just don’t like any of these fluffy dresses.” I shrug my shoulder.

“Ok, you know what? I know what can help both of us,” from her tone, I can see that she is a bit annoyed that I am delaying choosing a proper wedding gown. The perfectionist she is, she wants to push everything forward and make this the wedding of the year. “How about, we take a break from this,” she stands up, holding out her hand for me, “and go have some lunch?”

“That sounds great,” I reply, accepting her hand and happy to get out of the shop.

Walking a few blocks, we enter a shopping center in which Mary declares she knows a place. We walk in the Italian styled restaurants only for her to order a simple salad,

“Honey, I was planning to lose weight whenever Ethan decided to marry. But with the sudden decision and how my utter happiness makes me eat a lot, I doubt I will lose much,” she says sassily.

I smile faintly forking my pasta.

“Ok, I get what’s happening,” she says, putting her half-eaten food away. I look up at her alarmed. She knows about her son’s f*cked up deal? How does she know? How much does she know? So many questions and yet very little answer for them. “It’s getting closer to your wedding day and you’re suddenly depressed with all these plannings. It’s completely normal, honey. It’s called Bridal Depression,” she explains,

I release a breath I didn’t know I was holding. Thank God she doesn’t know anything. Internally, I frown. She doesn’t know. And thinking she will know one day when Ethan and I get divorced shatters me. She will be heartbroken, holding up all her hopes to make this match work. “I guess it’s what you say it is,” I agree, not wanting to explain to her that I am depressed because her son would rather spend his time with his lover, and not me. That he doesn’t give me enough attention to know that I too have feelings for him.

Ugh, I sound so pathetic. What happened to the promise of never feel, never show?

After taking a short break, we decide to meet with the wedding planner for the final decisions and plans. On short notice, we make arrangements for a wedding cake, theme, flower arrangements, meal courses. Unfortunately, or better, fortunately, they didn’t let me have a choice in honeymoon arrangements. Mary wants it to be a complete surprise for both Ethan and me, which I assume Ethan wouldn’t take it kindly.

Too tired to continue, considering my hectic schedule for the next day, I promised Mary that I would visit a few other boutiques, perhaps on my ways, to choose a wedding gown. It’s funny how I care how the gown would look when the wedding is nothing but a show.