I looked at Tyler on stage as my people were shutting down.
He was playing peep and I was singing along. I miss his so much. I was fortunate enough to actually know him and every time I hear his voice I remind myself to celebrate his life.
Me and Tyler didn't get along. At all. I didn't laugh at one of his jokes one time and he took it up the ass and ever since he just doesn't fuck with me. And I don't fuck with because he talked mad shit about peep before he passed and now he played his music.
"Put this in the safe." I instructed Stacy (a worker).
I wanted to check out Paris and his music.
Tyler announced Paris and the music began. The guitar was beautiful. I'm a big guitar fan and when it whines like it does in his song it just sends chills down my spine.
you're my angel wing/
that St. Laurent/
my Gucci shirt/
come and take it off
I look at his flesh as he reached at it.
Wow. The effect he had on the crowd was moving. I really wanted to jump in and start a pit but not to alternative music. Can't disrespect culture like that.
The song was damn good but short. He then performed gone which I had heard before but I had no idea it was him.
It cool having a face to a song. I honesty thought the whole song was just trippie.
I went on with my day after that. Following up on my employees and my merchandise.
I know I'm coming off as a total hard ass and an up tight bitch but I have to keep myself on a leash because I can wild out at the drop of a dime.
I used to get really fucked up. Especially in Arizona I would get cross faded every damn day and that was only fuel to the fire inside of me.
I have really anger issues. I'm not physically violent but I'll hurt you with words and I'm destructive to myself and well, property.
But I'd never hit a person unless I was cross faded or something.
I have a boyfriend though, and he's helping me get over my bad habits.
Of coarse I wanted to smoke and drink and stop being worried all the time but I have to prove to myself that I can maintain being sober.
6 months is coming up in a couple weeks and that's when I'm allowed to get buck wild.
Daniels name popped up on my phone and I answered.
"How the tour going. Sorry I didn't call yesterday I broke my phone just bought this one."
"How'd you break your phone and I'm good."
"I sat on it the wrong way and bent the fuck out of it."
"Christ. It's because you've got a fat ass man." He laughed in the other end and I smiled.
I was in one of the little room I said I'd be in.
"Hey I bought you that deftones shirt you wanted." I choked on air.
"Daniel that shirt was $500 dollars. Are you crazy?" He laughed and I was genuinely grateful.
It was a cool shirt from the adrenaline album which is very rare because they don't have those shirt anywhere.
"A thank you would—
He kept talking but a hard thud was heard from outside my door.
"I'll call you later okay." I said and hung up before running to the door.
