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Photo #10

23 June 2018

"Mina, what do you want?"

"I want us to talk."

Just then, a melody cut through the tension. Our gaze dropped to the phone Mina was holding. I caught her hesitating upon the caller ID. I shrugged as she threw me a nervous glance.

She turned her back to me and answered the call in a whisper.

"Jeong? No, I'm eating lunch with Nayeon. I'll see you tonight. Love you, bye."

I made a mistake for eavesdropping. Rolling my eyes at their brief exchange, I winced at the thought of how much Jeongyeon cared about Mina.

I remained poker face when our eyes met again. She was biting her lips, a habit of hers whenever she felt nervous or conflicted.

"You can leave now. Your girlfriend needs you," I said.

"Are you pushing me away again?" she asked.

"I push you away?" I scoffed.

"Don't act dumb, Chaeyoung," she replied sarcastically.

"You know what? Suit yourself. I'm done here," I threw my hands up in exasperation and was about to storm off when Mina caught my hand.

"See, you're pushing me away again," she remarked.

I ripped her grip off my hand, "I am not. I'm simply just putting myself away from unnecessary arguments. I'm making this easier for you."

"Stop being all noble. How many times do you want to walk away from your problems? How many times do you want to assume things will just fall back to their own places themselves?" she asserted.

"Assume things?" my voice just raised an octave, "I'll tell you a thing or two about assuming things. You assumed I cheated."

"Well, YOU DID!" she shouted.

I let her accusation slashed my heart. Mina hated me so much that all she could remember of me despite our four years together was how I "cheated" on her. Anger boiled in the pit of my stomach.

"I DID NOT!" I roared, as she took a step back, "How many times do I have to fucking tell you I did not?"

Mina stood frozen as she stared at me with her beautiful doe eyes.

"I've said it once last night and I'm saying it again. I did not cheat on you," I repeated my statement.

"Yet you didn't tell me until now. Don't you think it's too late?" she said, her voice was cold.

I shook my head in disbelief, "I just want you to know."

"You could've done it when you had the chance. Where were you all these years?"

Her question rendered me speechless. Where was I all these years? Oh yeah. Cowered away because I was afraid of rejection, so I pretended I would wait for Mina to come back to me one day.

Of course I wouldn't admit that. I was a stubborn coward.

Why were we even arguing over things that didn't matter anymore?

"You shouldn't have followed me," I sighed, changing the subject.

"For one moment right there, I thought you were gonna say sorry. I thought you've changed. Guess I was wrong," Mina wore a sad smile.

I looked at her.

"We've been through so much," tears threatening to spill from her eyes, "We parted on bad terms. If you think I took it well then you're wrong. In fact, our breakup crushed me. I was never the same again. I had hoped that you would come and save me from the heartache but you never showed up. Was that your way of telling me how unworthy I was to you? If that's how you see me, then you have no right to say that you miss me, you still love me. None at all!"