LOVEHATE

7

I sighed loudly and went back in the lobby elevator, pressing the silver button for Shawn's floor. I cursed my stupidity on the short ride up. Honestly, I wished I'd just stayed home tonight with Hulu and some ice cream.

I walked to his door and knocked, praying that Lillian or Owen answered.

Nope.

"Change your mind?" Shawn asked with a wicked grin as he leaned against the door frame, a cup of coffee in his hands.

"I forgot my coat. It's in the closet," I said, avoiding looking at his handsome face because it was making my stomach do flips.

"You should come have dessert. It's cheesecake," he said, not moving from the doorframe.

"That sounds delicious, but I really just want to go home and get into bed," I said, still looking away from his face.

I was trying hard to be nice and to avoid snarky comments. It hurt me that he'd called me a bitch, and I just wanted to get my damn coat and leave before he had a chance to insult me further.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

I looked up at him. He no longer had a smirk on his face and actually looked concerned. I guess he didn't know what to make of me being unsarcastic.

"Not really. I'm tired of this thing between us. It bugs me that you think I'm a bitch. Honestly, it's to the point that I think I can't go out with my roommate anymore because you keep popping up and nothing good comes of it when we're together."

He looked surprised by what I'd said.

"I'm going back on tour after Christmas. When I'm gone you can safely go out with your friends without the risk of me ruining your night," he said, his voice sounding almost remorseful.

"Great. Can I please get my coat?" I asked, feeling worse about this exchange than I had when we were being genuinely nasty to each other.

"Come on in," he said, finally moving out of the way.

"Sadie!" Lillian yelled happily when she saw me. "Are you staying for dessert after all?"

I was about to say no, but decided I could suck it up and stay for Lil's sake. She was so freaking pleased that I'd come back.

"You know I can't resist cheesecake," I told her. This wasn't totally a lie. Cheesecake was one of my favorite foods.

The party was gathered at the dining room table and Lillian and Owen were serving up slices of cheesecake drizzled with hot fudge sauce. They also had coffee on the table. I sat next to Shawn and helped myself to a cup, though I knew it would keep me up. Given how I was feeling right now, I probably wouldn't sleep much anyway. I was sure I was in for a long night of watching TV to distract me from my irritation about Shawn.

As Lillian placed my dessert in front of me, she whispered in my ear, "I'm so glad you came back."

I smiled at her. "I'm sorry I almost left before." Lil was such a good person that I hated the thought of hurting her.

We sat there talking and eating the indulgent cheesecake for over an hour. Shawn shared the details of his tour, which I couldn't help but find fascinating. I was a bit envious of his life; traveling the world had to be incredible.

I helped with the dishes again as the other guests left. Owen packed up the leftovers and put them in the freezer for Shawn as a thank you for loaning out his home. I suspected they'd go uneaten, because I couldn't picture him reheating leftovers. That was something normal people did, not celebrities.

Lillian and Owen went to get their coats after putting all the cooking gear they'd brought with them into a big box.

"I'll see you tomorrow," Lil said as she handed me my wool coat. It was no surprise she was staying at Owen's. She spent her weekends there these days.

"Yep. I'll probably be in my room studying."

I put my coat on and was about to follow them to the door when Shawn stopped me.

"Can you stay a second?" he asked, his voice uncharacteristically gentle.

I nodded because I didn't want to argue with him in front of our friends. Plus, if he was going to possibly offer up an apology, I wanted to hear it.

Lillian and Owen thanked him several more times and then left, but not before Lil gave me a knowing smile. I shook my head at her. I knew what she was thinking.

"What's up?" I asked Shawn as I buttoned my coat. I felt inside my pocket and grabbed my keys.

"I'm sorry I was an ass earlier. I was drunk, and you bring out the worst in me sometimes."

So he did apologize, but he made it clear I was to blame. Typical.

"You sobered up quickly," I said, choosing to ignore the second part of his statement.

"I'm nowhere near sober, but I'm sober enough to know that I was obnoxious."

"I accept your apology. Have a good tour," I said as I turned towards the door. This wasn't easy. Now that we were alone and not fighting, my resolve started crumbling. I wanted him so much.

"Sadie..." he said, his voice rough like it hurt him to utter the two syllables of my name.

I had my back to him, but I could picture the look on his face. I'd seen it the night we'd hooked up. I willed myself to not turn around and to reach for the door handle. If I could make it out to the hall, I'd be fine.

"Why me?" I asked as I stared at the door, unable to use it. "You could have anyone. Why do you want someone you don't like at all?"

He placed his large hands on my shoulders, and I felt warmth radiate from where he was touching me.

"I don't know. I really don't. But you do something to me that no one else does," he said.

Don't turn around, I screamed internally. And definitely don't respond to what he said!

It was no use. Turning to face him, I looked up into his caramel colored eyes. I felt myself melting.

"I hate you for making me want you," I told him.

He gave me an irritatingly endearing crooked smile. "We're so good together, though."

I shook my head. Thinking about how good that night had been was going to get me in trouble.

"C'mon, Sadie. You know we are. Do you really want to leave?"

"What I want and what I know is best are not the same thing. I want to stay, but I know I should go."

He looked at my lips and then licked his. He knew exactly what he was doing to me. This guy was a pro at seduction, or maybe he just had me figured out.

"Stop," I whispered.

"Stop what?"

"Stop looking like you're about to kiss me."

"Okay. I'll stop."

And then he kissed me. I suppose technically he was doing what I asked. He was no longer looking like he was going to kiss me; he was actually doing it.

His lips felt so good against mine. They were warm and soft and he tasted wonderful. How was that possible after a garlic-laden dinner and black coffee?

I opened my mouth slightly, wanting more. His tongue found mine. I moaned, which made him smile into our kiss.

My mouth moved from his lips. I ran my tongue along his sharp jawline and then softly kissed my way down to his neck to the vampire bite moles. I sucked them lightly, but not enough to leave much of a mark.

"Jesus," he muttered before moving his mouth to mine so that he could kiss me again.

He pulled back after several minutes of this. "You should take off your coat. You feel a bit warm."

It wasn't the coat heating me up, but I didn't tell him that. I slowly took it off and went to the closet to hang it up. I then walked down the hall, past the kitchen and dining room, past the piano and living room, and straight to his bedroom.

Four hours later I reversed my path as I snuck out to go home.