Secrets Not Lies

Chapter Seventeen - the Bathroom

"I already told you," I shouted angrily at Phil, "I'll tell them soon!"

"But when's soon?" he yelled in frustration.

I exhaled an irritated breath before answering, "When I'm ready!"

We both fumed in silence, our eyes pinned to each other as if we were daring the other to speak. His gaze broke away first, falling to the ground. His face caved to a look of pure hurt.

"I...I don't know if I can do this anymore if you aren't willing to tell people about us," he said solemnly.

My expression melted to one of regret. "You need to understand it isn't you that's the problem, it's me," I told him. "I'm not even sure if I'm gay."

"Has dating me not proven you are?" he inquired quietly, his eyes lifting back to mine.

I was silent for a long moment, studying his features. My breathing was heavy from getting so worked up and yelling, my chest rising and falling quickly despite my calm demeanor.

"I just don't know," I said, my voice sorrowful.

Phil visibly swallowed. "Then I guess I'm leaving."

He turned on his heel, miserably dragging himself from the room, leaving me staring at his back as he left.

Everything was still for a long minute and I stayed frozen in place. There was a rustling sound to my right before Chris spoke up.

"Well done!" he praised, applauding loudly at our acting.

I finally let out a breath and relaxed form the position I'd been holding until his cue. A wide grin cracked onto my face at his approval. I noticed the same with Phil as he returned to the room.

That had been the fifth time we'd shot the scene as every other take seemed off. Chris and Pj had made some minor adjustments to the script, so with me and Phil giving it our all, we were finally good.

"Took long enough," Pj sighed from beside Chris, turning the camera off. "Now we can break for lunch."

I rolled my eyes at him although my stomach was growling impatiently at me. "You didn't even have the hard part to do," I stated. All he'd done was press record.

"I still earned myself food," he countered, raising his hands defensively.

"We all did our parts," Phil interrupted, clearly not wanting me and Pj to continue our argument. "What are we doing for lunch?"

Chris shrugged. "Pizza?"

"Pizza," I confirmed while the others nodded. That seemed to be our typical meal after working ever since Chris had ordered it during our run through. I had to admit, the pizza place he liked was pretty good. I could never get sick of pizza either.

"I'll get the usual," Chris told us. He strolled from the room, pulling his phone from his pocket as he left.

Phil collapsed onto the couch of the living room, clearly as exhausted as I was. It took all my self-restraint not to stand there and devour him with my eyes. 

Ever since we'd kissed for the first time the day before, I hadn't been able to stop the thoughts of him from crossing my mind.

He'd been looking desirable all morning leading up to our leaving. I didn't know where we stood with one another so I hadn't tried making any moves on him. We had a typical morning despite every second longing for each other's lips.

I could tell he knew how I was feeling by the small things he did to tease me, like subtly brush his hand against mine every time he walked by. I'd also looked over at him multiple times to find his lip caught between his teeth in the most alluring way as he watched me. Since we had company he knew I wasn't able to do anything about it.