Her Splash of Color | ✓

✤ 1.15 try for me ✤

Posted September 14th, 2018

✤ Rihaan: 1.15 try for me ✤

Dad walks into the game room that afternoon and taps my shoulder with an instruction, "Move over."

Wordlessly, I scoot to the other end of the couch instead of seating in the center and picking up the second controller, pass it over before switching the settings to include two players.

I don't ask what must have happened for him to feel the need to play video games and relax. He'll usually just shoot hoops in the backyard where we have a basketball court if something is stressful in his life. Now, we quietly play, crossing one level after another. I figure he'll eventually share what is bothering him if he needs to talk of it with someone. Besides, I am so not old enough to be solving his problems.

Twenty minutes later, he does speak. "Wasn't I supposed to ground you?"

"Shh." I say in response. We may have talked of it but if mom isn't pushing it, let's not go down that road.

Replying with merely a chuckle, we continue to play in silence.

Until it's been an hour and his phone screen lights up with a call. I glance at it and him, but he continues playing - sparing it no attention. So, I ask, "Aren't you going to get that?"

"It's not important."

I narrow my eyes at him. How can he know it's not important when he hasn't even see who was calling him? Still, I don't question it. He's already in a weird mood that I don't yet understand. I decide to play it safe and let it roll out on its own.

The phone rings once more - but it's a good thing that it's on silent so we only see the screen lighting up - and followed by a few texts. Then, five minutes later, mom walks into the room.

She looks to have been rudely woken up from her sleep as she drops on the couch in between us with a long frown on her face. "Why can't you just answer your stupid phone?"

He grumbles under his breath, "Because I'm not interested in what she has to say."

"Armaan..." She starts to say in disapproval.

He cuts her attempt to change his mind in a clipped tone, "I meant it, Riddhima."

Uh-oh, I think. He called her by her name. Whatever it is, he means business.

He continues as I sit there awkwardly deciding whether to stay or make my exit. "I am done with all the crazy traveling that keeps me away from you two for like half the year. It was supposed to stop a long time ago, you know?"

She exhales, not starting an argument. She rubs his arm in a soothing manner, "I know, honey. We imagined a normal life... but we can't just ignore something extra-ordinary when it comes by, right?"

He puts the controller away, taking her hand and lacing their fingers together. "I get it. I don't want to sound ungrateful. I admit... I do love every second I am out there making a difference and how you get to save lives. But when everyone keeps asking what's next, all I see is you and Rihaan... and our incomplete family."

Okay, I am definitely intruding on a private matter. Before mom can say anything, I quietly interrupt. "Uh, I'll be in my room."

They both look towards me in acknowledgement and do not stop me. I reach the doorway just as I hear her say, "Armaan, we do have a complete family. Why do you think it's incomplete or that Rihaan and I are not happy with our lives?"

I should leave but even though I walk out of the room, I find myself staying... hidden from the doorway, unable to walk away.

"How can you be happy, Basket?" He challenges in a regretful voice, "Do I really need to remind you of times when you've needed me, but I was halfway around the world somewhere? And our family, how is it complete? Now it seems ages ago, but we talked about having more children, didn't we? You wanted that. But because of my career, I always had to be away. We kept telling ourselves that once things calm down, we would plan a family but it just... never happened. Things haven't calmed down even today, and I refuse to keep waiting for it to. If I want things to slow down, then I have to start somewhere to make it happen."