Maybe

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Maybe death isn't all that bad.
Maybe death is really just one's freedom from this world.
I sure wouldn't know; nobody would know. Death is one of those things that is undefined, unknown by all those who roam the galaxy. The only thing that is guaranteed is that you can't come back from it. It swoops you away, basking you in all of its endless glory.
Nothing is permanent. Love will eventually fade, grief will soon be done and over with, friends'll leave you, and even your home, whether it be physical or metaphorical, will eventually crumble and disappear. The one thing that is permanent is death. Yes, it is a frightening idea, being taken away from everything you know into the unknown, but it's something we all must face someday.
Truth is, we all die eventually, whether you're ready for it or not. Death is cold and unforgiving yet a blessing at the same time. It's a two-sided coin of both fear and acceptance.
Both my worries and your's disappear when we finally pass. What once weighed you down and constantly nagged you is gone, liberating you. At the same time, it's terrifying. What lies beyond our deaths is unknown.
Is there an afterlife?
Is God real?
Are Heaven and Hell even a thing?
Is there really anything after death?
So many questions seem to follow death, left unanswered by a simple lack of information.
In all honesty, the idea of death scares me. I don't want to die. I don't want the people around me to die either. I'm not looking forwards to the day I'll attend my mother or father's funeral, watching as their body is lowered into the ground, far from where I am. The people who raised me, dead and buried six feet under. I don't want to imagine no longer being able to hear their calling voices or having them pester me to take care of myself. Even worse, I don't want to imagine myself in their position. But one day, I'll fine myself there, on the brink of death with few left close to me.
Maybe I'll have kids to leave behind.
Maybe I'll die too young to have a family.
Maybe I'll die before I can start a legacy.
So much left to ponder. So much left to stress about.
As soon as you're born, you sign a warrant for your death. It's not something you can refuse, simply something that comes with living. Maybe as I grown older I'll learn to accept death and my fears that follow it, but as of now, I can't. I still have my whole life to live and a long future ahead of me. So as of now, death can not reach me, and neither can it reach you. For now, we are safe, living another day closer to our inevitable end.
Death's patience is unlimited and willing to wait out the rest of our days, as it has done with many others before us. It will take us when the time is right. And finally, we will be at peace.
•••
so i'm not dead and uh yeah sorry for being gone for like two months. i've been working on a chat fic just lost motivation (again). take this shit i originally wrote as a rant for myself, please, i'm desperate :')

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