Through different eyes

4.1 Thomas

"And than all you need to do is multiply the mass by the velocity and you've got the answer" Eric stated as he helped me out with physics. It has never been my best course and he knew that by now. It was Tuesday evening and he promised he would help me study for our test this Friday. Normally I would ask him to come by tomorrow but since I have to go to the hospital and I'd probably feel miserable on Thursday due to the side effects... You get my reasoning.

"Wow, it all makes sense now" I said, wide eyes. How could Eric make it look so simple?! I just didn't get it!
"How the hell are you this smart?"
He shrugged with a small smile.
"It's in my genes, I guess"
He instantly shut his mouth, like he shouldn't have said that. Why? I frowned at him but he suddenly changed the subject back to our exercises.

"Anyway, you just lack the motivation, I know you can do it just fine on your own" he stated and a grin spread on his face.
"You know what? How about this? You get 5 questions right in a row and than I'll give you something you want in return"
"Like what?" I asked.
"I dunno, whatever motivates you the most" he shrugged. A smile crept up my face and I saw his one disappear.
"W-what? Why are you looking at me like that?" he asked while shifting uncomfortably.

"I want you to kiss me" I smirked and a blush covered both our faces.
"S-so you made up your mind huh? You like me" he said quietly while staring down, avoiding eye contact at all cost.
"Maybe, well, I don't really know. But it's definitely leaning that way" I said and inched closer to him.
"So, question?"
"Right!" he said, snapping out of whatever trance he was in and started searching in our textbook.

...

"Alright, fifth question" Eric sighed.
"If you get this one right, you're winning a kiss. So I'll make it a bit harder on you"
"Not fair!" I exclaimed.
"Life isn't fair" he stated and continued to search in our book.

"Aha! This is a tricky one! Solve this and I'm sure you'll nail that test Friday"
He handed me the exercise and I furrowed my brows. This was fucking impossible! How could he make me do this?!
"I'm gonna get a drink, you want some to?" he asked as he got up.
"Oh, uhm, just water is fine" I muttered while focussing on the task at hand.
"A-and uh can you get my basket? It's almost time for my medication..."
"Sure, I'll be right back" he said with a weak smile and disappeared behind the now closed door.

I worked hard on this exercise, wanting Eric to kiss me like I would die if he didn't. I was the one who had kissed him last weekend. He never kissed me first. Why did that worry me so much as it did? Why should I care that we hadn't kissed more than 2 times? He asked me out, didn't he? That means he feels something to, right? I refused to be some charity case!

"I'm back~! Got the answer yet?" Eric called out as he entered the room again.
"Oh, uhm, just give me a few more minutes" I smiled. He returned the gesture and placed a glass of water in front of me. He put down the basket on the far side of the table so it wouldn't be in our way while he sipped from his soda and watched me as I solved this impossible problem.

"The answer is 21" I said and looked up at him. Please let it be correct...
"Is that your final answer? Are you sure?" he asked, checking my calculations. Shit. Was it wrong?! I scanned my papers, searching for a mistake I could've made, but found none.
"I-it should be 21..." I whispered.
"So that's your answer? 21?" he asked and I nodded a bit unsure. Eric grinned and nodded.
"That's correct"

Relief washed over me. Relief and anger.
"You asshole! How dare you let me doubt myself like that!" I exclaimed.
"Well doubt is essential in every science, that's why I want you to be sure of everything you say" he explained.
"Anyways, congrats, you solved 5 problems in a row, you may now collect your price"
I smirked and stared at him, or more precisely, his lips.

"The deal was for you to kiss me. I'm waiting" I smiled. He rolled his eyes and got up, walking around the table to get to me. He sighed and pulled me up, placing his hands in my neck.
"I'm a terrible kisser, just so you know" he stated.
"What? No, I really liked it the previous times" I said, seeing him look away.
"Well, here goes nothing" he muttered and planted his lips on mine.

Before I could comprehend what was happening, he already pulled away.
"I-I, uhm, have to get going, my parents are gonna freak if I'm not home by dark" he rambled quickly, grabbing his stuff in the process.
"I'll see you Thursday! M-maybe... O-or certainly Friday!"

He ran out in a hurry, before I even got the chance to say anything to him. Strange... He never acted like this before... Maybe I shouldn't have forced him to kiss me? Or tell him I'm almost sure I actually like him? But he asked me out... I don't get it, why was he trying to be so distant when he didn't actually want to? Or was it me he didn't actually want and did he just realise now? I shook my head. No. Eric is a good guy. He would be honest with me.

Right?

I sighed and stared at the ground, thinking I did something wrong, when I saw a small stuffed bunny laying on the ground. Wait. That's not mine, I'm quite certain about that. So was it Eric's? It was a keychain, the bunny not even bigger than the palm of my hand. He left in such a hurry, he must've let it slip or something. A small smile lingered on my lips. Eric had a fluffy bunny keychain. Oh God, he's so gay.

I placed it on the table, still smiling like an idiot. Of course he would be honest with me, he's the best person I know. He's just so innocent, I like that about him. Thinks he can fix every problem, acts like he carries the world on his shoulders sometimes... I admit that I don't always know what's going on inside his head but I don't care. I like him and I'm gonna make sure he falls for me as well.

"What are you smiling about?" Ellie asked as she walked in the room.
"Nothing" I said quickly and hid the bunny behind my back.
"Watcha have there? A gift from your boyfriend?" she smirked.
"I saw him leave just now, seemed like he was in a rush"
"Yeah, he needs to catch his bus on time" I muttered as an excuse.
"So what is...this!"
She sneaked up on me, snatching the keychain from behind my back and raised it instantly high up in the air, out of my reach.
"Oh my God! That's so cute!" she giggled.
"I-it's Eric's, h-he forgot" I said, my face turning red. Why? I have no clue.
"Are you sure he didn't intend on giving it to you?" she smirked.
"W-what? No!" I exclaimed.
"Now just give it back! I don't wanna lose it before I get a chance to return it to him"
"Of course" Ellie grinned and gave it back to me.

"Don't forget to take your pills"
"Is that why you were actually here? To tell me to take my medication" I asked, raising a brow.
"Well, it would be a shame if you dropped dead all of the sudden cause you didn't" she stated.
"Besides, dad would be super angry at me so just take them and we can order pizza or something"

I rolled my eyes and sighed, grabbing the glass of water and the basket of pills. After a few minutes I was done and Eleanor ordered us two pizza's. Dad was out of town for work and he wouldn't be back until Friday which meant Ellie and I were on our own. Not that we haven't done this before.

...

"You should go to bed soon Thomas, it'll be a tiring day tomorrow" my sister stated and I groaned, knowing she was right.
"At least tell me you can take me there?" I asked with big puppy eyes.
"Nope, sorry, I can only pick you up" she sighed.
"But it's not the end of the world, right?"
"I guess not..." I muttered. Great, I had to go to the hospital alone tomorrow. Again.

I was getting the feeling my family cared less and less as the days went by. Guess we were just slowly getting used to the fact I was permanently sick? I mean, I won't be cured soon, that's for sure. If I'll be cured at all, that is... Hmm, well, dying is kinda like getting cured... All the bad stuff dies... I chuckled at the dark, toxic thoughts. All the bad stuff... Like there was ever any good stuff to begin with.