TMB ❧ j.jk✔️ (REVISING)

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I remember... doing really weird things as a child

Dissecting toads...spiders...worms

I really enjoyed doing those things... It was interesting and entertaining to see the blood of those organisms ooze out of their bodies, so damn easily. I usually examined the dead bodies... took each organ out, squishing and smelling...

tasting

I sometimes liked to display the dead bodies on my walls, so that whenever I walk into my room, I could look at what i've made. One day my mom barged into my room and started to clean everything since she has smelled something really sour and disgusting coming from my room. I could sense her horror and how she was concerned about what she had found in my room-the dead bodies on my walls

My mother then continued to tell therapists, pyschiatrists and other family members what I have done and all of them said the same exact thing...

To not kill anything again.

One day, a voice suddenly appeared in the back of my head. It told me how it knew my desire to kill and it helped me do it. It taught me how to find these organisms, how to hide them, how to lie to my parents, how to do everything. It was making my mind go crazy...so crazy that I couldn't take it anymore. 

And as if the voice knew, on what I was thinking on doing... it said:

"Kill yourself ."

On the same night I 'tried' to commit suicide by stabbing myself multiple times, my parents were coincidentally murdered. I woke up in the hospital the other day and the doctors told me that the neighbors heard crying and screaming that night. If it wasn't for them, I wouldn't have been alive right now.

"What about my parents?" I asked on my hospital bed, biting on my lip as a part of me wanted them dead as the other part of me didnt. 

"They didn't make it," He answered