A Crush

Chapter 1

01.08.1987 - New York

Jon's Point of View:

Me and the boys were standing backstage, ready to get out and rock the hall. We had only five more shows after that one til the tour was finished. "You can go out", a security man named Fred finally said. "OK, let's get out and rock!", I yelled, holding my hand into the middle of our circle. Richie laid his hand on mine, David on Richie's, Tico on David's and Alec on Tico's. We raised our hands up, screaming: "One for all, all for one!", and headed out on the stage. Adrenaline rushed through my veins as the whole people started to scream. The lights turned up and Richie and I sang together: "Shot through the heart and you're to blame, you give love a bad name!" Richie started to play the opening riff, smiling all the way. As he looked over to me I blushed and started to sing. Yeah, I have a huge crush on Richie. I haven't told him yet, but I think he will never want to be more than friends. I mean, it's nearly impossible, but a small part of me still keeps the faith.

The concert went great, especially Wanted Dead Or Alive. I let Richie sing the half of the second verse alone, because his voice is so beautiful. Every time he sang, my heart beat a bit faster. By the end, it was nearly racing. The people started clapping and screaming as we all hugged each other friendly and left the stage. I wanted to go to my dressing room, but someone pulled me back. It was Richie. I started to blush as I saw the wide smile on his face. "Hey, I just wanna tell you that you've done great tonight", he whispered and I blushed even harder. "T-Thanks, you too", I stuttered, getting nervous because he stood so close to me. He smiled and sneaked a short kiss on my cheek. Then he just turned around, walked to his dressing room and left me alone with my sweaty hands and my red cheeks. I couldn't move. He kissed me on the cheek. HE KISSED ME! Still trying to come to terms, I touched my cheek, where I could still feel his warm lips burning on my skin. It was the reality. "Jon, it really happened!" I told myself, repeating it in my head again and again.

My heart was still racing faster than ever as I turned around, changed my clothes and stepped into the tourbus. I was the first one, so I went up the the sleeping area, laid down on my bed and closed the curtains. I stared out of the window and started to think. What if he didn't mean it? He would never love a man, especially not his best friend. The damned truth killed my last faith with one hit. But somewhere deep in me I still had it, his kiss kept it alive. But that didn't mean, that I wasn't down. I felt so dead inside. The tears finally started to stream down my face while the only thing I could thing was: He didn't want me. He never would. I closed my eyes, hoping that that pain was going to be over someday. Suddenly I heard the curtains open and pretended like I was sleeping. "Hey Jon, are you okay?", I heard David saying silently. "To be honest, no. I don't know what I should do anymore", I replied, sniffed and whiped the tears off my cheeks. "If I can help, please tell me what I can do. I don't like to see my favourite Lead Singer like this", he said and gave me a big, brotherly hug. "Dave?" "Yeah Jon?" "Can you tell Richie that I want him to come up here? I want to talk to him", I finally asked and laid down on my bed again. "Of course", he replied and left me alone with my thoughts. I closed my eyes and thought so much, that I fell asleep.

I woke up fast, because someone laid down next to me. I thought about before and felt how tears left my eyes again. The words were burned into my brain. He would never love a man, especially not his best friend. As I felt his warm hand on my cheek to stroke the hair out of my face, heat and the desire to kiss him rushed through my body. Richie saw my tears and looked at me confused and shocked. "Oh Jon, please don't cry. I want to see you as happy as before", he whispered worried, wrapping his arms around me and pulling my back tightly against his chest. Now my heart was racing faster than ever in my whole life, but the tears were still streaming down my face. I wondered if he would stop it if he knew what he was doing to me. My hands were getting sweaty again and my cheeks turned to a bright red, even though I fought against it. "Are you crying because of me?", Richie suddenly asked, even more worried. "K-Kinda", I stuttered and whiped the tears away with my sleeves again. After I said that, it was dead silent until I felt a warm tear falling on my cheek. It's wasn't mine. It was Richie's. I turned around in his strong arms as fast as I could, looking into his worried chocolate brown eyes that were loosing tears. "Please don't start to cry. One's enough", I whispered begging. "Just tell me what's up", Richie pleaded. "I-I can't", I whispered, knowing that I was half-lying. I could tell him, but I would probably destroy our friedship and I would loose him. That would destroy the band. I couldn't risk something so important. "You can tell me everything, you know that", he said softly. "But this one I really can't", I replied, closing my eyes, searching for a good lie that would stop him asking. "Please", he whispered with a broken voice. I opened my eyes, looking into his and got lost in them. "Why?", I asked him, knowing that I could never lie to him. "Because...I love you", Richie finally whispered, looking me deep into the eyes.

I couldn't breathe for a few seconds. My head was spinning, my brain tried to process his words. He loved me. He really did. "I-I love you too, Richie", I finally whispered, still trying to come to terms with the whole thing. His cheeks turned red and he started to smile as he grabbed my hand. I tangled my other hand in his long brown hair, pulling his face closer to mine. Richie looked into my eyes and then at my lips. Then he looked at me asking and I closed my eyes. He leaned down to touch my lips with his. My heart started to race and fireworks were setting off in my whole body. I replied the kiss with all of my love and relaxed completely. This was all I ever wanted. We parted our lips after a while and looked into each others eyes lovingly. When I wanted to pull him into another kiss, we finally heard someone sneaking towards my bed and parted as quick as we could. Only a few seconds later, David opened the curtains with a worried look on his face. "Jon, are you okay now?", he asked, still worried. "Yeah, I'm feeling great, thanks for asking", I replied, noticing the confused, but happy look on his face. "Richie, how did you do this?", Dave asked jokingly. Richie's cheeks turned red and he looked down nervously. Dave just smirked and turned around, going to the other boys again. "Do you think he noticed?", Richie asked me, a worried expression on his face. "I don't know, but by now it doesn't matter", I replied, conecting his lips with mine once again. It felt so damned good and right. After a while I felt his tounge sliding over my bottom lip and parted my lips. Our tounges started to play with each other and we deepend the kiss. That were feelings that I couldn't describe, because they were so beautiful. "Rich?", I finally mumbled against his lips. "Yeah Jonny?", he replied, stroking my cheek. "Can we be together, even if it gets difficult?", I asked, looking into his chocolate brown eyes. "Of course. I love you, my sweet babe", Richie whispered and kissed me once again. In that moment, I didn't mind about anything but being with him.

"Boys!", we heard Tico yell, "Dinner is ready!" "Ok, we're coming!", Richie yelled back and got off of me, to allow me to get up. "I hope they won't notice", I whispered, looking at his messy hair, his red cheeks and his glowing eyes. "They won't, I promise you", Richie replied, but I could tell that he didn't believe himself. We finally hopped out of my bed and went downstairs, to eat with the boys. "The lovebirds are here", David said and laughed his ass off. We just rolled our eyes, trying not to smirk. The boys had treated us like that since the band got together, but that time we felt a little caught. We finally ate all together, talking about tonight's concert and the tour. David looked at me the whole time, like he was knowing what Richie and I had done upstairs. But he never said a word about it. I finally took him by his arm and pulled him away from the others. "Why are you looking at me like this the whole time?", I asked him and raised one eyebrow. "It's a little too obvious, don't you think so? You were so down and suddenly you were so happy, after Richie went upstairs. You like him, don't you? You like him more than just a friend. And he likes you too." I blushed at his words and looked down. "That's a clear yes", David said smirking. "Yes, but how did you find out about Richie?" "Just look at his messy hair, his glowing eyes and his wide smile that doesn't fade. He is a little too obvious, too", David replied and I blushed even harder. "Ok, you're right. Just promise me something", I said nervously. He nodded. "What?" "Don't tell the others, especially not Doc", I pleaded, and he nodded again.