The Mafia's mind

Chapter XXVI

POV: Angelo

"Go home Angelo. The doctor said that she will be asleep for another few hours at least." My mother, Kataya tells me.

It still seems so foreign to me, to have a mother. My father would never talk about her, he would only say that she was a snake and a bitch.

But still, I'm not leaving this hospital.

"No, I'm not leaving." I respond flatly.

"Please Angelo. Your becoming ill. You haven't eaten or slept properly for the past three days. Just go for an hour. Have a shower, get changed, eat lunch." She desperately pleads.

No matter how much pleading she does though, I still refuse to leave.

"I'm not leaving and that's final." I cross my arms across my chest to emphasise that it's my final decision making her sigh.

"Alright then, I won't force you. At least come sit with us inside." She tries to reason, but I just can't bring myself to face Aletta...

I did this to her...

My father was right. I should have stayed away from her, but for some reason I just can't bring myself to keep my distance. And now, as a result of my  selfishness, she has to pay the price.

I glance over Kataya- my mother's -shoulder to see her sleeping peacefully in her hospital bed.

As I watch her still figure, my stomach churns. The doctor said that she slipped into a mini coma, and I know that it's all my fault.

Watching her laying there makes me want to shout at the top of my lungs and flip every chair or table and punch every wall.
I want to run over to her an shake her until she wakes up.

No matter how badly I want to though, I can't. It's not just because I'm not allowed, but because physically I can't bring myself to go close to her.

The guilt of what I have done is consuming me completely, brewing from the inside out.

I see her when I close my eyes and when I look in the mirror. I see her pain, the anguish I have caused.
I hear her screams in the dead of the night, when not even the wind is howling.

I see the tears that fell from her eyes to the ground whenever I look at the floor.

I feel the icy chill of her hatred crawling down my spine as her painful words echo through my mind.

After the shooting at the mansion, I swore to myself I would leave Aletta alone. Seeing her in so much agony shattered my heart completely.

My father was right. I should have left her. I'm only bad for her.

Despite this, I just can't bring myself to keep a distance.

Recently I've found that everything has started to revolve around her...

She's always on my mind and all my actions are affected by her. I barely do anything for myself anymore, everything I do is for her, whether it's planning a date or trying to help her.
All my free time is spent with her.

To anybody they may feel frustrated or annoyed that their whole world revolves around one person, but to me, it's not like that.

I admire her so much. She is my whole universe. She is all that matters to me, and I would do anything for her.

It doesn't bother me one bit that I put her above everyone else, because to me, she deserves it. She deserves every single star in the sky and if I could give them to her, I would.