the lives of butterflies

year 5 - the beginning (winter pt.3)

"You must've been really busy these past few days, huh, Jake?"

"Why ever would you say that, Alair?" Jacob frowns, and he suddenly looks much older. Even the way he brushes back his hair, how he speaks, it all sounds of exhaustion.

"You have super shadows under your eyes. And you walk like an old person."

"I am an old person," he grumbles, grinning. "Tea, Kyrov?"

His eyes seem to bore into mine at the question. I can't help but feel nervous. "Yes, please."

He relaxes and tips the kettle into the tiny cup. "Can't let you leave without suffering the bitterness again."

"If you suffer, Kai, I'll drink it," says Master.

I chuckle. "Thank you for sparing me, Master."

Jacob's eyes are half-closed, a small smile on his face as he gazes at us. "Are you two ready yet?"

Master looks at me. I nod back at him. "Yep. You're going to start at the very beginning, right?"

"You don't want to work backwards?"

"Another time."

"Some good stories start in the middle," Jacob says, sipping his tea. "But I'll start at the beginning, so nothing is lost." He tilts his head, thinking. "Do you remember when I left our village very early? I was younger than you and Merle."

"Yeah. She barely talked about you all that time you were gone."

"Oh, I'm not surprised." He shakes his head. "But it doesn't matter. I never missed her. Before university, I spent my time at school, learning different subjects like science, other beings, math, reading and writing, and world history. It was invigorating. I never wanted to leave. Every book I read, every person I met, I wanted to take it all in. I always thought that was my actual life. Not looking after animals or tending the crops."

I catch Master's eyes brighten. He knows what Jacob means.

"I lived in the dorms with the other students," he continues. "I worked in a library, and learned more about the people around the city. Each day was an opportunity to learn something new." Jacob smiles wistfully. "Then I got accepted into university. It was very competitive. There were tests and essays. And there were separate essays for the scholarships. It was difficult to write about such personal things to a committee of strangers. There was an interview for the university I wanted to attend. To be honest, I really didn't like the entire process, but it was necessary. I knew that those dedicated months of intense work would mean a rewarding path later."

"That's amazing, Jake!" Master breathes. He is bouncing his leg up and down with excitement. "So that's what you were so busy about?"

"Yes, Alair. I'm not very sorry about it, either, for neglecting my family duties." Master's eyes widen. Jacob laughs. "Think of it like this: if you want it badly enough, you'll do anything you can to get there. Think of your purpose, your motivation to push you through those hard times. I wanted to get into university, so I had to do everything I possibly could to make that dream real."

"I kind of feel like I did that to an extent. At least for school," Master muses, looking into his teacup. "Kai, it was you who did a lot of the work I usually did."

"I'm fine with it, Master. I simply do the work I am assigned. I know studying and teaching means a lot to you, so those are your priorities."

"He knows you, Alair." Jacob's voice is soft. "He cares about you."

Master stiffens for just a moment before relaxing. "Well, we have been living together for a few years. I guess it's enough time to get to know each other. Sort of."