"self control"

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chapter 10:

self control





(this song ain't got nothin to do w/ this chapter but damn i just love frankie o)








"So, you played bartender last night?" Cassidy asked through the phone, and I nodded my head as I hummed in response. I was stress cleaning my apartment, which happened very rarely, but it was a deep cleaning that took all of my energy to complete. "With Calum?"

"Yes, that's what I just told you," I said, sort of hatefully as I pressed my phone in between my ear and my shoulder. I was dusting off the shelves in my living room and was having a tough time getting every inch.

"I was just making sure, Em. What's up with you, anyway? You're so on edge," Cassidy pointed out the blaring obvious and I suddenly fell onto my couch in defeat. "Can you tell me what happened during your shift?"

"Everything was going really well at first," I began, knowing I needed to talk out how I was feeling. "Calum and I were having too much fun working together, business was great..."

"Okay, and...?" Cassidy asked and I let out a deep, frustrated sigh.

"I was tending the bar, like a bartender does, and this guy came up to order a drink. He seemed harmless, he cracked some jokes, and then he asked me for my number. Obviously, I was not going to give him my phone number, but then he got a little more intense, and he was asking me some personal questions, just a real jerk, and Calum overheard, I guess, so he came over. This guy had nothing over me, so I wasn't worried about him, but when Calum came over, he told the guy to leave me alone. The guy started to become unnecessarily worked up, and one thing lead to another, and..."

"What, Emmie? What happened?"

"If you would let me finish, I—"

"You paused! Why would you pause?"

"Cassidy, let me finish!" I groaned, cutting her off and hoping she wouldn't cut me off. "The guy made some comment about my body that didn't even matter, and Calum swung at him."

"Calum hit him?"

"Yes, Cassidy, I just said—"

"Well, what happened then?" I closed my eyes as Cassidy cut me off for the umpteenth time and tried to find some humor in her hyperactive curiosity.

"Calum hopped the bar," I told her, sighing quietly. "And then they started fighting... which resulted in Reese and Pete having to break it up."

"Are you serious?" Cassidy asked and I slowly nodded to myself, mostly in disbelief as the scene replayed in my head.

"Everyone is fine, and Pete just got both of the guys to agree to leave instead of getting the police involved," I said, almost in a daze. "It's just bothering me so much. I can't stop thinking about it, and how physically upset Calum got."

"Have you talked to Calum?"

"Not really..." I sighed, feeling guilty for not talking to Calum much in the last twelve hours. "I texted him to make sure he got home safely, and he sent me a text apologizing... but I didn't answer it."

"Emmie..." Cassidy said, sighing quietly as she clearly sympathized with my situation. "I never imagined Calum as a fighter."

"Who gets into a fucking fight when they're twenty-three?" I asked, suddenly becoming angry. "Why would you do that? You can get into so much unnecessary trouble. And over a little comment? It's not worth it, I'm not worth it."

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