There's a monster in my closet (Johnny Depp)

Chapter 14

Johnny's P.O.V.

I left quickly the studio and got in my car. Jesus, it was like I couldn't breathe in there!! I stayed a little there to catch my breath. Then I saw everyone else coming out of the studio. I first saw some people that I didn't recall their names -yeah, they're not that important people for me- and then I saw Alicia. Charis!!! I mean Charis! Ughh... She was laughing. I don't understand, she didn't care at all after what happened? But I had seen her crying! Well, maybe that's why she didn't care... anymore. Because I made her cry, the last thing I would ever want in this world to happen.

Charis wasn't alone. Albert came after her. That's why she was laughing? She was laughing with Albert? He had already made her like him? How? I can't even remember if I have ever made her laugh! I tried to remember if she had ever laughed when she was with me. And I found out that this was a bad, a really really bad idea, because I remembered a lot if things I should never have remembered!

I shook my head to clear it from these unpleasant memories. Now it didn't matter. She was angry with me and was laughing with Albert. I immediately felt to regret what I had said to Albert! I was so stupid! I thought that if I saw Charis with somebody else, it would be easier for me to get over her. But I was wrong. Of course I want her to be happy, but damn, I want her to be happy with me!!

I saw Al coming to me for a little. Charis didn't come. She left. Just like this morning, when she got in the studio with Albert and she turned around, choosing not to come with him to me. That had hurt me so much. I just kept on staring at her as she walked slowly to Louis. I was wondering if she could feel my eyes on her, but I assumed that she didn't, because she didn't seem awkward at all!

"Hey Johnny, I just wanted to say thank you for what you did..." I heard Albert saying, so I stopped looking at Charis and looked at him.

"What?" I mumbled.

"For what you did! Thanks pal!" he said again, poked a little my shoulder and left.

"Yeah, right..." I mumbled, although I knew he couldn't hear me anymore.

I stared for a little while at the wheel with my head and look empty. Then I sighed and drove away as Albert's words from this morning came and started echoing in my head again. "Hey John!... I'm great, what about you?... That's great!!... Yeah, listen, I need your help.... No no, it's just, I like a girl, and I don't know what to do... I've seen you with her before, so I thought that you could help me a little... Charis... Yeah... I know she's great... So, you think I should ask her on a dinner or coffee?... Yeah yeah, got it, I won't say 'dinner or coffee', I'll say only one of those two!... Thank you!"

What the hell was I thinking and I help him to date her?? Apparently, she had accepted his invitation. And, apparently, she was having fun with him. And, also apparently, she wasn't mad with me anymore, because she didn't care to be!! Of course, apparently, I should be the one to be mad at her! She had lied to me and apparently, she didn't even feel guilty about that! I was in love with her, apparently, and that's why I still cared for her... Apparently, I have said the word 'apparently' too many times, because, apparently, she is driving me crazy!!

Yes... That's not me! I don't recognize myself anymore. I don't know what she's trying to do to me, but I shouldn't let her. I want to be mad at her, and I am mad at her, I'm so mad at her... But I can't be mad at her!! She is turning me into something really scary, because, the truth is that I hate the word 'apparently', and she made me say it 10 times in less than a minute!!

-

I finally arrived at my house, after I stopped to buy some ice cream first. I sat on the couch and tried to think a little about all that have happened clearly. I couldn't understand. I could have any girl I wanted! Seriously, I could date even the first girl that I would see on the street. Or, at least, almost every girl. And I wanted this girl, that had lied to me for no serious reason, and was pretending to love me? Why? If she didn't want to be with me, then fine, she could be with Albert. Or even Louis! Because I know he likes her too. I'm sure of it.