{Twenty-One} Maybe It's Better This Way

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My lips trembled with anticipation of what I was seconds from doing. My eyes grazed the orange prescription bottle with my brother's name printed across it. The tips of my fingers enclosed around the lid, pressing it down and twisting it as fresh tears sprung to my eyes, blurring my vision.

I stared into the bottle, touching the back of my hand to my mouth to force back the cry ready to escape it. Seconds after tilting the bottle to pour the small pills into my hand, the entire bottle was swatted out of my grip and became a mess all over the counter top, sink, and floor.

Before I could get a coherent word out, Colton grabbed the liquor bottle sitting on top of the stove and set it on top of the fridge, far beyond my reach.

I glanced around me, then turned back to him. "Look at the mess you made."

My words didn't phase him. He didn't budge from where he stood inches in front of me, his expression unreadable.

"Don't tell me you were about to do what I thought you were about to do." He finally responded.

I looked up at him, the image of him fading into a blur. He slammed his fist against the counter, anger igniting in his eyes.

"Ending your fucking life isn't going to solve anything, Avery! You know that. I know that." He growled through clenched teeth. "The bastard that did this to you will get away with it and another innocent girl will have to experience the same thing. Is that what you want?"

The moment I flinched, his tense shoulders fell back and he met my eyes with a pleading look. "Please don't do this, Ave. I need you."

I shook my head. "Nobody needs me, Colton. I saw tonight that none of this shit ever gets better. I'll be living like this for the rest of my life. Constantly in fear, constant-"

He touched his index finger to my wrist, interrupting me mid-sentence.

"Avery, do I have to get down on my hands and knees and beg you not to do this, to think about what you're doing for a second? What do I have to do to make you understand that there are people that care about you, that love you, that need you, Ave."

"So you expect me to keep running from myself?" I whispered.

Colton stepped closer, his hand falling on top of mine against the counter. "You can't run from yourself when there's nowhere left to hide."

We stood there silently for what felt like an eternity. Colton with one hand against the stove, blocking my way out from one side, and his body against the fridge of the other, not allow an escape route for me on that side either.

Both of us grew rigid when the light flickered on.

My eyes immediately darted over Colton's shoulder to my brother's hunched figure in the entryway. He looked as if he'd just been woken from a deep sleep. His hair was still a tousled mess, and heavy bags hung under his half open eyes.

He grew more alert when he caught sight of the mess of pills scattered all around us, his top lip curling back angrily as he turned his attention to me. "Where the hell have you been hanging out, Ave? Don't tell me you're doing drugs and drinking and shit now. I've been down that road already and it doesn't do any good." Landon said.

I opened my mouth to confess and apologize, but Colton jumped in before I could.

"It was me man." Colton flashed a wry smile at his best friend. "I've been really stressed and thought popping a pill and having a little liquor might loosen me up a bit. I didn't think you'd mind."

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