This Gray, Unfortunate Place (2)

5 - In That Way

If I'm being honest, 

I like to rush into relationships,

not without things, however, bein' 

checked off of a sort of list. 

I feel like slow, organic 

steps to further the development 

of bonding

are just arbitrary-

That if we knew what we wanted,

and civilly 

discussed our priorities 

at the very beginning,

then things wouldn't be so messy. 

At least, that's what I believe, but 

I'm really just afraid 

of the truth-

That feelings can form 

when you least expect them to.

Because all of my spontaneous attractions

and bonding 

have led to bondage 

as I have to shut myself down 

to keep from falling for a friend

who, in the end, 

never liked me in that way.